The nut of this post is such, go out tomorrow and get to’ up, root for Arizona on Sunday.

To the former, in case you didn’t know, Saturday is actually a cult holiday called Bulletproof Saturday. Since year-after-year the man refuses to give us Superbowl Monday (or Big Zero Monday, as I like to call it) off, a couple years back I deemed the Saturday prior to: Bulletproof Saturday. It plays to the theory (note: I also came up with the theory) that you can go out the night before the Superbowl and get plowed/cranked/fuhshickitee’d (sp.), and no matter what you’ll wake up the next day sans hangover because of the adrenaline rush of Super Sunday <- see, bulletproof.

I have a mixtape of Ghostface interlude skits (ya know, the annoyances between actual songs on the album) that end in a barrage of bullets. I play it during Bulletproof Day brunch.

…..


On to why I’m rooting for Arizona. It’s simple. Mike Tomlin is just too goddam cool.

The guy just does not respect the notion that you shouldn’t be operating at all times at maximum magnetism. Gawd! How i abhor his magnetism!

This is actually the first shot that comes up if you google image search Mike Tomlin + Miles Davis… that photo of Omar Epps comes up too.

To the victor go the spoils! Meet Matt Knell, the winner of the first ever Superbowl Giveaway (first ever Giveaway, period) on this here blog. He wins that gaggle of goodness I was pimpin’ on behalf of Pepsi about a week ago. For those of you who weren’t aware of the contest, here’s what Matt wins, and the rest of the star-crossed contestants can only continue to pine for…

I asked Matt, a crushed Giants fan in fact, to give us some insight into his Superbowl plans…

Super Bowl party plans probably consist of snacky goodness in the

apartment with the girlfriend, and perhaps a few others - we’ll dress

up the cat and our chin in Arizona Cardinals jerseys (NFC all the

way).

It took me a minute to decipher chin, actually it took me until Matt emailed me again granting me permission to post photos of his chinchilla (oh!) named Minnie. Here’s that strange animal in question now…

Congratulations to Matt, who also happens to be a blogger (you can check him out at TagSmith.org and SM4SC.com)

For the rest of you, just gonna have to wait until the next epic consumer brand marketing scheme here on Steady Burn - cause I’m sure as hell not giving away any of my own sweet contraband.

Go to the Steady Burn Facebook Page!

Oh! Look at the hair that Brandon Jennings has been sporting while playing Euro ball!

Lot of differing reports on this guy lately. According to NBADraft.net, his stock is not fading whatsoever (unlike his hair); they have him going fourth overall in the draft this Summer. Then again, the New York Times made it sound like Jennings was having a less than awesome time spending this year Italy. (“They treat me like a little kid”, “I’ve gotten paid on time once this year”, “it can break you.” )

Wait a second here, when did Baron Davis make a movie called CRIPS & BLOODS: MADE IN AMERICA?
That is foolish, yet outstanding. And award-winning evidently.

Some strong endorsements from the Hip-Hop community - Lil’ Wayne (see it or don’t see it…just know it’s important) and Snoop Dog (my nephew, Baron Davis, yeah, the All-Star point guard…).

Narrated by Forest Whitaker, directed by Z-Boy Stacy Peralta (Dogtown & The Z-Boys) and Executive Produced by Baron Davis, Crips & Bloods is currently playing at the IFC Theatre in New York City.

(c/o Nah Right)

So apparently an episode of One Tree Hill is threatening to come to life, and the girls’ basketball team from Texas high school The Covenant School is suffering crippling remorse after trouncing an unworthy adversary Dallas Academy 100-0 and wants to forfeit the game because they feel bad.

A Texas high school girls basketball team on the winning end of a 100-0 game has a case of blowout remorse.

Now officials from The Covenant School say they are trying to do the right thing by seeking a forfeit and apologizing for the margin of victory.

“It is shameful and an embarrassment that this happened,” Kyle Queal, the head of the school, said in a statement, adding the forfeit was requested because “a victory without honor is a great loss.”

The private Christian school defeated Dallas Academy last week. Covenant was up 59-0 at halftime.

A parent who attended the game told The Associated Press that Covenant continued to make 3-pointers — even in the fourth quarter. She praised the Covenant players but said spectators and an assistant coach were cheering wildly as their team edged closer to 100 points.

Awarding the demoralized team a pity win, would you say this is fanning the fire, fueling the fire, or is this jet-fueling the fire? You want to get these kids back a little self respect, where was the coach’s order to have one of the irrational teens take out some kid who went 10-15 from behind the arc with a cold-cock out of frustration. (If everyone directly involved is hell bent on making a teeny bopper drama out of this, I’m not going to be the one who reverts. No way.)

Rivals.com - School seeks to forfeit 100-0 win

Hey, if a team that lost games during the regular season 47-7 and 56-35 - with a Quarterback who has come back from the dead more times than agent Tony Almeida on 24 - can make it to the Superbowl, then why can’t a blog that rambles on about Lil Wayne, roller derby, Natalie Gulbis, and kickball get in on the Superbowl marketing blitzkrieg, right?

Right. That is why yours truly has been given the privilege of giving away this cachet of prizes from Pepsi.

This Ultimate Pepsi Super Bowl Party Pack includes:

• 1 football
• 1 beverage pail
• 1 snack helmet
• 2 key chains
• 2 hats
• 2 t-shirts
• 5 Pepsi 24 pack coupons
• 5 Frito Lay coupons

The process is real simple, just go to Facebook here and become a fan of the new Steady Burn fanpage. I’ll be adding righteous content to this page moving forward. You can go there right now and check out the videos from last year’s debauched experience attending all three legs of the Triple Crown of Thoroughbred racing. I also added some photos of the RZA taking on chess prodigies on his birthday at a Wu Chess event from last year.

On Monday I’ll kick off Superbowl week by selecting a winner from all the Facebook fans and I’ll FED-EX you this prize pack. (I’ll even pop for two-day delivery!) Hugging Harold Reynolds is giving one of these away too, and they have a much more creative approach. So head over there and offer up your best Superbowl watching experience, and double your chance to win one of these bad boys!

To address a few FAQs, this is totally a boiler room operation we’re running here, so people I know personally are absolutely eligible. Also, if you email me a photo of your dog and promise to make him or her wear the chip helmet during the game (with the Doritos bowl filled) the odds may be skewed in your favor.

So on Monday morning I’m planning to have my lovely assistant (fresh off her stint at the Rusted Gun Saloon, pictured above) write everybody’s name down on little slips of paper, throw them all into a hat, and pour me a snifter of brandy. I’ll then select three names and take a healthy swig.

Next, I’ll light-up a cuban stogie, take a puff, then torch two of the names and those people will receive absolute squat. The person whose name dons the remaining slip will emerge victorious and receive the t-shirt, the football, the beverage pail to add to their collection, the league rated impact resistance snack helmet, and all the other accoutrement you see above

……..

Go to Facebook and fan the Steady Burn page right now because the winner will be selected at dawn on Monday (I gotta smoke down that Cuban, crush brandy, kick my lovely assistant off my apartment premises, and show up for work by 9 - it’s going to be a daunting A.M.). Every human alive is eligible, except for this kid…

Go to the Steady Burn Facebook Page!

I am legitimately worried about this guy’s career peaking too early.

Japanese phenom Ryo Ishikawa became the youngest golfer to win on any tour at the age 15, and at age 17 has already risen up the ranks to #60 in the World. Not to mention he finished 5th overall in the money last year.

He’s a phenom festival, plus he looks like he’s going to unleash a tornado whirlwind kick after he’s done reading this green

I’m sure he could have just called somebody if he wanted to get exempt for stateside PGA event this year, but before he had the chance to do that Arnold Palmer played his consummate golf legend card and took matters into his own hand.

According to PGAtour.com, Palmer sent Ishikawa a personalized letter asking him participate in the Arnold Palmer Invitational at Bay Hill (March 23-26). Ishikawa, known also as ‘the shy prince’, graciously accepted and will be one of two exempt players who will get to compete against a top-ranked field next March that could include Tiger Woods, who could potentially return to tour action by then.

(Japanese phenom accepts Palmer’s Bay Hill invitation)

Government Mandated Playoff? I Don’t Think So (The World According to Moondog)
ESPN Fixes Up Sunday Night Baseball Broadcast… By Adding Steve Phillips?! (Sharapova’s Thigh)
HHR’s Penthouse Forum…Win a PEPSI SUPERBOWL PRIZE PACK (Hugging Harold Reynolds)
Titans QB Collins added to Pro Bowl roster (FoxSports.com)
When A Blonde Backs Caboose Into Scott Van Pelt (Busted Coverage)
The NBA’s midseason report card - Hot or not style (Cuzoogle)
Kevin Johnson said he would skunk Barack Obama, Video (NESW Sports)
Z-Trip’s “The Victory Lap: The Obama Mixtape Part 2″ (Music For Perfect People)
In Mild Upset, Red Sox, Jonathan Papelbon Avoid Arbitration Hearing (Fanhouse)
How To Defend Against A Bear Hug (Barstool Sports)

Kudos Hulu. I thought I was going to spend the entire Inauguration asking CNN.com to bark like a dog for me, but you did the damn thing. And now I can move on to poppin’ champagne like we won a Championship game! (Later on actually, right now I’m celebrating with a chicken cutlet heroe with fresh mozzarella, prosciutto, basil, olive oil and balsamic vinaigrette - a sandwich that you cannot defeat, nor outlast).

Enjoy everybody. I believe it was Motley Crue who put it best when they said Little bit better than I used to be, ’cause I’m alive!

…And I believe it was Puffy who said, ‘Before you change the World, you gotta change yo’self.’ (Man, NOTORIOUS was terrible, and awesome, and ridiculous, and tragic all at the same time. See it.)

Now check out the audio and transcript of the inauguration speech courtesy of The Random Forest.

Low Vs. Diamond was totally worth braving the elements for last night. Phase one of my musical odyssey this weekend es completa. Weezy F. Baby tonight!

Here’s Low Vs. Diamond’s video for Heart Attack, which is pretty wild. And also check out their performance on Leno here.

( www.myspace.com/lowvsdiamond )

VITAMINWATER NOT SO SEXY AFTER ALL (With Leather)
+1000 For Alex Trebek (Awful Announcing)
Jerryd Bayless Is Nasty (Intentional Foul)
There’s a Mike Tyson documentary coming out? (Epic Carnival)
The Fake Joba Chamberlain Gave A Woman His Fake High Heater (Don Chavez)
Spanish Prison = Kick Ass (Brahsome)
And Then There’s JJ (And One)
The Temp does: The return of “The Office” (9 to Fried)
Take That, Most Dominant Player On Earth! (Tirico Suave)
LIONS HIRE JIM SCHWARTZ (The World of Isaac)

A guy whose probably best known for albums titled Wowee, Zowee and Crooked Rain, Crooked Rain, is an unexpected Fantasy BBALL fanatic.

Just two hoops leagues that I’ve been in for about five years or so. The first year we played just five categories – and Allen Iverson was the king of five-cat!!! I also remember Brevin Knight being quite the stud in five-cat as well. As for fantasy, I play all three sports. It’s a tossup between baseball and B-ball for me. Different fish. Baseball is all about the roto, basketball is all about head-to-head match ups…

That’s knowledge from the dude who wrote the lyrics it took a giant ramrod to raise the demon settlement.

Recently, Stephen Malkmus, Indie-Rock hero and former bandleader of Pavement, sat down with Steve Alexander from Rotoworld (who he evidently plays in a fantasy league with) to talk fantasy basketball. We learned that Malkmus’ team is named Widespread Perkins. Sadly, he’s not so much a fan of Perk as much as he’s making fun of a dude in the league whose got man-love towards him. Alas.

Malkmus also apparently once spelled “chutzpahs” for a double-double word bingo (“that was deep”) in a game of Scrabble. I wonder if you have to agree to ask him the obligatory “Favorite Scrabble Moment” question before you get to interview him? I know I’d have that in my contract if I pulled off that word, for like what? 178 points?

Check out the video for Pavement’s ‘Cut Your Hair’…