Sometime between now and the next five years, Roller Derby is going to make its big splash on the sports landscape. It may be short lived ( remember Major League Roller Hockey? ) it may be sustained (see: the goddam X-Games, which refuse to relent). It also may happen sooner rather than later. Defending National Women’s Flat Track Derby Champs Gotham Girls Roller Derby kicked off their 2009 campaign with a throttling, a throuncing, a veritable beating down of the Boston Massacre All-Stars on Saturday, with a 188-44 victory in front of sizable crowd at LIU Brooklyn campus on Saturday (check out the full house here).

This is only the latest instance in the interest in Hell on Wheels heating up. ESPN aired a feature last year on the Roller Derby revival, and many media outlets have followed suit (Check out Metromix’s feature on the Gotham Girls). Not to mention, the movie that Drew Barrymore and Juno are making ( Whip It! set for release sometime in 2009).

In honor of Roller Derby’s return for what might be the sport’s break-out year, let’s do a comment contest…

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In the DVR era, you have to show restraint. You cannot watch it all, or you will die…while lying prostrate on the sofa.

Frankly, I’d love to see ex-NFL linebacker Dhani Jones gets decidedly mangled doing all sorts of goofball sporty stunts. But certain shows just can’t be squeezed in lest I resign myself to certain, imminent death by loafing.

Anyway, how has Dhani been fairing? Based on this preview, not well.

It’s kind of understated, but is he or isn’t he about to get BULLDOZED by that horse?

H/T to Your Scrumhalf Connection for posting the preview. Check back tomorrow for possibly some intelligently crafted thoughts on a show I actually watched - like the Teen Wolf episode of How I Met Your Mother.

I hadn’t made the connection, but The Dude’s car in Big Lebowski is actually a Ford Torino, the watered down version of the Gran Torino, reaffirmed as bad ass by Clint Eastwood in last year’s film by the same name.

Thanks @Emily_at_Asylum who published the The Top 10 Losermobiles From the Movies today on Asylum for bringing this to light.

I’ll award my own personal honorable mention to the Ford Tempo in Encino Man ( I used to drive one of these ballbusters. A ‘94 model that my parents still own in fact.)

Starting today I’m going to be contributing to Spewf.com.

What is spewf exactly? Did you see last night’s How I Met Your Mother when they were talking about Canadian sexniques? (Ex. The reverse Rick Moranis). Well, I couldn’t say for sure, but spewf sure sounds like it could be one. And How I Met Your Mother is a lot funnier than people give it credit for.

(Actually I don’t even know how you pronounce spewf ( like spoof? spughff? )

The blog is owned and operated by my good buddy Kevin. Kevin is predominantly and affectionately known around the sports blogosphere as Kevin the intern, intern from the hallowed halls of Busted Coverage. (Also, more GrandmasterB design handiwork on the Spewf header.)

Check out my first post today on the Gorgeous Rock Ladies of SXSW, featuring the likes of Alexei Perry from Handsome Furs (my complements to her seamstress)…

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Yesterday, I gave a quick rundown of some of the more unorthodox NCAA Tournament bracket pools that are going on this year. And if you care at all about the maintenance of my pork consumption, you’ll be rooting for this whole every five years UCONN gets the No. 1 seed in the West Region and takes home the trophy scenario to pan out as it has been written.

Something else cool that we’re doing this year is the newly launched March Madness Blogger Fantasy League, which I’m lucky enough to be participating in with some of the most elite sports bloggers on the interwebs.





Basically, each of us gets to pick five players whose stats we’ll tally throughout the whole tourney. After the Final Four, the blogger with the highest sum total of points, rebounds, and assists from their five players is crowned champion.

Today I woke up to learn that this thing is probably over for me before it even starts. One of my guys, North Carolina PG Ty Lawson, is out today against Radford (exact wording actually was, “huge probability” he won’t play; yeah, he’s not going play). They better win today, and Toe Stiffness Lawson better respond in game two in a big way. I’m now hedging my bets that UCONN does make that run, and A.J. Price goes buck.

Here’s A.J., Lawson, and the rest of my horses along with their stats from the regular season…

Dante Cunningham, Villanova (16.0 ppg, 7.2 reb, 1.2 ast)

Ty Lawson, North Carolina (15.9 ppg, 2.8 red, 6.5 ast)

Johnny Flynn, Syracuse (17.5 ppg, 2.8 reb. 6.7 ast)

Tyler Hanbrough, North Carolina (21.4 ppg, 8.2 reb , .9 ast)

A.J. Price, UCONN (14.0 ppg, 3.3 reb, 4.7 ast)

In my infinite wisdom, or possibly against my better judgment, that’s who I got. Wish me luck.

If last year at this time you had told me that next year at this time (which is this time in space right here right now, Will Robinson) I’d be entering an NCAA tournament bracket pool where to the victor went a collection of no less than five variations of pork product, consolidated in edible log/explosion form…man, I’d go ahead and call. You. Wacky. But I’d befriend you immediately.

Fast forward a year later to today, I’d be calling you my fun genie, and offering you the executive fun genie privilege of having your face photoshopped onto one these fun genies pictured below. Because as it would have it, I have indeed found myself to be a registered participant in an NCAA tournament bracket pool where I am competing for the chance to sink my chompers into one of those baconized beast.

If you decide to enter, check out my bracket - it’s called FUN GENIE.

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Two other unorthodoxed NCAA tournament challenges of note for you to try your hand at:

• Someone sinister came up with the Bracketology XD’s Bracket Challenge the idea of giving away a night of glee which includes a meet-and-greet with Penthouse’s 2007 Pet of the Year, Heather Vandeven. You don’t need a fun genie to tell you many, many people are going to enter this.

• Also worth checking out, The Locker Room Alumni Bracket Contest - a tournament that’s pitting celebrity alumni from the schools in the Mountain West Conference. If for no other reason, go cast a vote Chesley “Sully” Sullenberger (Air Force Alum, duh).

My good pal Jake who writes for this blog sent this to me yesterday letting me know that Joakim Noah’s dad and former tennis great Yannick Noah may have, as it’s been rumored, in fact at one point in his life been legitimate musically. Why else would Central Park have added him to the list of artists playing Summerstage, right?

Yannick the tennis phenom went pro in ‘77 at the age of 17. Among his feats of tennis prowess include becoming the first Frenchman to win the French Open in 37 years when he did so in 1983 (dropping only one set throughout the tournament). During his career, Noah won a combined 39 singles and doubles titles and was inducted into the Tennis Hall of Fame in 2005. He also played on the French Davis Cup Team for 11 years. In 1991, Noah captained a French team which won its first Davis Cup title in 59 years.

That same year, Noah released his debut album Black of What. Apparently, after winning the Davis Cup, he led his player and the whole stadium in a rousing rendition of Saga Africa, his breakout track off of Black or What. (Wikipedia - Yannick Noah)

Did I mention the show in Central Park is free?

I haven’t done a link dump in a dog’s age. And that is definitely a school I am not too cool for. These are brought to you by the legendary Ol’ Dirty Bastard, R.I.P. and Shimmy Shimmy Ya.

Five Golfers We Hope Pull A Henrik Stenson (And Five We Don’t) ( Sports Rubbish )
It Always Rains In Pac-land ( Total Pro Sports )
Will Ferrell “We Are Marquette” ( NESW Sports )
Michael Phelps on Today Show Talks about his “Mistake;” Doesn’t Actually Admit what “Mistake” Was ( Hugging Harold Reynolds )
Ovechkin Continues To Flex Big Giant Muscles ( Josh Q. Public )
Using a middle finger to referee ( Intentional Foul )
Even sluts embrace social media to find work ( 9-to-Fried )
Uh oh… Marko Jaric is in trouble… ( Epic Carnival )
IOWA PLAYER FINISHES SEASON WITH ZERO FREE THROW ATTEMPTS ( The World of Isaac )
Cramer and Stewart Go Head to Head … Awkward ( Brahsome )

The Business of Sports threw up a post today championing the twitter usage of the Worldwide Leader. As much as I’d like to tear it down, and say they’re just using it as a megalo-rss feed, I can’t really do that (BLAST!) As BofS points out, ESPN is actually engaging it’s audience kindof on twitter. For example, Both the PTI and the Around The Horn twitter handles are inviting viewers to ask questions via the platform. For instance, @PTIshow put up a post yesterday asking viewers to suggest a guest for today’s show. Additionally, ESPN Regional Television created @Big12Network for fans to get updates on conference tournament happening - I badly wish The Big East was doing this.

Without letting them get off scott free, of the seven twitter IDs that Business of Sports highlights (minus the true ESPN.com feeder ID @ESPN) the follower to following ratio is about 10 to 1. And I hate, hate, hate to admit it, but Plaschke is the one doing the best job of joining in the fray (1,419 followers; following 1186). So, hop to Reali and fantasy guy Matthew Berry! (Fantasy Guy Matthew Berry gets special commendation for setting his location as Sadly, CT.)

Link: ESPN and Twitter


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I might get defriended for this, but I think more than just his 5,001 Facebook friends should know that former UCONN Husky/ soon-to-be former Golden State Warrior Marcus Williams isn’t afraid to throw one out for you to ponder…

Personally, I think the Ghostface said it best with So after the laughter, I guess comes the tearz. Of course, his NBA contract wasn’t bought out yesterday.


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