Surf Ninja Robs Banks, Meets his Demise Shredding a Colossal Wave in Australia

wait…





That’s the plot from Point Break. What I meant was…

Ice-Wielding Pro Surfer Allegedly KOs 3 Women

What a completely, unavoidably clickable headline – kudos SbB.





The story goes that pro surfer Chris Ward got in a bar tussle in Mammoth, CA that devolved into him punching out three women and threatening another with a chunk of ice.

Ward maintains his innocence. The bar manager is calling it one of most disturbing displays he has ever seen. And the whole thing allegedly started because one of the women started wearing Ward’s jacket.

Hey brah, I believe it was Chris “I’d never hit a woman but…” Rock who said it best when he said, “If a woman wears your jacket in the club, she’ll probably su….” Well, I guess that’s irrelevant at this point.

Ward is going to be charged – probably assault, battery, drunk and disorderly, and attempting to enact a fatality on someone – yet, he’s still allowed to compete on the surf circuit (???!) I think the surf commish is taking innocent till proven guilty a little too literal in the case of Sub-Zero Ward here.

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