Following Tiger Woods’ car accident/ holiday media debacle this weekend, Yardbarker.com’s Director of Programming and friend to Steady Burn, Alana G, pitched the idea of a Tiger Woods crash video playlist to MTV Jams via Twitter, and MTV might run with it!







It is an 100% true statement to say that MTV considering a video playlist inspired by Tiger’s crash is the biggest media development in the Tiger Woods crash investigation at this time.

Great execution, Alana. If Tiger Woods is determined to play this one so close to the vest that I have to turn on The Today Show this morning and hear the likes of Mike Lupica say, “He’ll golf his way out of this.” (Also, a 100% true statement), then we should be allowed to throw some jabs in his direction.

Check out her suggested playlist at Alanag.yardbarker.com and send her some suggestion. Keeping with the sensibility of MTV Jams (the early 2000′s iteration that I’m most familiar with), for my suggestion – the artist is Usher, the song is ‘Confessions.’

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In honor of me, who is stepping up, and creating the family feast this Thanksgiving (I’m not joking, this is real), thought we’d have a little fun and do a live draft of Thanksgiving menu items to round out the short work week. Surely, it’ll generate some ideas for what I should include in my spread – 100% chance I won’t be able to pull any of your favorite delicacies off, but have fun playing and getting my hopes up.

The rules are simple, once a Thanksgiving appetizer, beverage, dinner item, dessert or after-dessert appertif has been selected, it’s off the board. However, we’ll reward your creativity and allow you to double-up, sort of. For example, if some real Thanksgiving cretin selects “turkey”, then feel free to select ‘“bacon-glazed turkey brined in butter and olive oil” right on top of that.

Additionally, there’s no order or limit to the number of selections. That means, plenty of opportunity to berate other people’s picks, and ostensibly their Thanksgiving familial tradition. So make your picks, then take a break and write a diatribe against Granny Sooze’s banana creme pie.

I’ll be moderating, censoring almost nothing.

Enjoy, and please avail yourselves of Delish.com’s list of the Most Fattening Thanksgiving Foods. Drafting opens today, November 25, at 11:30 a.m. EST

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Fisherman and futures trader Dave Lamoureux has a taste for danger – a danger he prefers to be served pan seared.

Lamoureux is essentially a big game sportsman, and his favored hunt – enormous tuna fish. Unlike the commercial tuna fisherman, with their big boats and harpoon wielding, Lamoureux prefers a line, a fishing pole, and the comforts of a recreational kayak that he modified in garage. Recently, according to the New York Times, Lamoureux’s and his one-man fiberglass vessel hauled in a 157-pound bluefin tuna, a record for a solo kayak tuna fisherman.

His most recent catch, on Nov. 5, was a 157-pound bluefin, a record tuna for an unassisted kayak fisherman, and a near record over all, topped only by a 183-pound halibut caught by Howard McKim, an Alaskan, in 2004. Reeling in a halibut, though, has been likened to hauling in a load of plywood, and some of Lamoureux’s admirers consider landing a bluefin, known for its power and ferocity, the greater feat. He is a hero at bait shops up and down Cape Cod. On fishing blogs, a few grumblers call him a dangerous idiot.

Lamoureax told the Times that when you hook one of these mothers it’s “sort of like a raging bull” – as the tuna will tow the kayak around until the fish expires from exhaustion. It can take hours for a bluefin to give. Here’s an idea of what it takes to reel one of these beasts in…

Lamoureax and his kayak, named Fortitude, will look to up the ante as he continues his quest, splitting time between his home in Chicago and the fishing waters off the coast of Cape Cod. Someday he hopes to one day push that record weight to 300-400 lbs.

I’d suggest a record tuna casserole bake-off at the local rod & gun for the locals in the community when that happen.
Catching Tuna and Hanging On for the Ride (New York Times)

(Photo via NYT)

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From a practical standpoint, by my estimation Mickey Mouse and The Marlboro Man are the top earners on this list, yet one of them is #1 and the other is ranked #18. Also, no real surprise who the top ranked 80's superhero personality is (#48). My dark horses on the list: HAL 9000 from 2001: A Space Odyssey and J.R. from Dallas.

Posted via email from mike hayes’s posterous

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Take it from someone who peruses frequently – there is never a shortage of asinine behavior happening on the sporting goods and sports memorabilia listings on Ebay. Take for instance, this joker, who’d ideally like you to pay $14 million dollars for an autographed pair of A-rod turf spikes. Or, if that’s too rich for your wallet, there’s a guy in Dallas who will sell you a two-field baseball complex for the Ebay buy-it-now price of $425,000.

Not far down the list from those featured items, you’ll find a serviceman from Fort Bragg, NC who, for the all-in price of $50,000 will sell you his arm - specifically, the space on it to buy advertising. This may well fit the profile of yet another dimwitted attempt at auctioneering, but at least hear this guy out…

I am trying to sell space on my arm, the complete and full arm. I have been having some small financial issues and I am really in need of some funds to help out my family and eliminate a few debts that have accumulated. My vehicle is running into the ground and I don’t make enough nor do I have the credit to just get one and start new. Please take this into consideration when reviewing this listing. I travel alot because of my job and I see many many people in many different places all over the country. But what I’m trying to accomplish here  is to just raise a little money to help out my wife and my son with a little better of a life other than living from paycheck to paycheck every month.


The buy it now is what I’m asking for the entire arm covered in your own personal art advertising your business. This is what I wish to obtain for the entire arm, total. So if you want the entire arm then we are gonna have to talk along the BUY IT NOW price. If you don’t want the entire arm, but just a portion of my arm, then email with any questions and we can quite possibly work something out about certain areas. The only thing that I ask is for you to be respectful, I WILL NOT TATTOO ANYTHING THAT IS RACIST, GANG RELATED, OR COMPLETELY DISRESPECTFUL TO INDIVIDUALS OR ANY NATION ESPECIALLY OURS. I am in the Army and I do have regulations that I have to adhere by, also being in the Army allows for mass advertisement. Every time someone you know gets new ink it is always the talk of the town. Please if you are interested send me a message and we will talk about specifics. Thank you and happy bidding or buying.

The only other hard facts we know about this guy is that the person who posted this, presumably his wife, goes by armywife8606 – and she’s received a 100% customer satisfaction rating on ebay. That, and the $50,000 is pretty much nonnegotiable if you want the whole arm, but if you only want quote: “a certain measurement of your logo to be plastered on my skin” he’s willing to discuss pricing.

I’ve had a hard time wrapping my head around this guy’s desperation. I want to give him the benefit of the doubt that he’s sincere in his extreme measures – assuming such, doesn’t $50,000 for a permanent advertisement seem a little low? This is the age-old problem with buying online and ebay specifically, it’s hard to get the full-story on what you’re bidding on.

This is probably as good an example of a misuse of an e-commerce website as someone trying to sell a baseball diamond. And unfortunately, I believe that the likelihood of arm ads getting sold online is as likely as someone shilling out $15 million for that lipstick wearer’s turf shoes. Still, I won’t call your methods asinine, armywife8606′s husband. Weird, clearly. But regardless, whatever your situation I hope things start looking up for you and your family, and you can take your forearm off ebay.

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Every game is this game.

And while we’re throwing some jabs the Lions way, fast forward four days in the future from their Doofus Bowl against the Browns…

This Thanksgiving marks the 5th anniversary of Detroit retiring Barry Sanders #20 – and it’s been at least that long since they should be allowed to host a Thanksgiving Day NFL football game. Since that 2004 game that honored Sanders, Detroit is 0-5 on Thanksgiving and has been outscored 179 – 62 by their opponents. The last time Detroit won on Thanksgiving was in 2003 against Green Bay, the team they face this year as a matter of fact. Also, the team that beat them 26-0 in Week 6.

The Thanksgiving games have been been a league tradition since 1920, and Detroit has been a host since 1934. However, what’s more important – league tradition or league integrity?

I’m not a league official, I’m just a guy who asks questions.

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For fans everywhere of speaking loudly for the sake of trying to make a stale point sound important,  I’m sure you’ll all be real fired up to hear that Jon Gruden inked a multiyear extension with Monday Night Football today. Plus, they’re gonna let him be a part of like five other projects.

Via the ESPN.com wire services…

ESPN “Monday Night Football” analyst and former longtime NFL coach Jon Gruden has agreed to a multiyear extension with the network.

Gruden, who joined ESPN in September to replace Tony Kornheiser in the MNF booth, will also appear on ESPN’s Super Bowl week and NFL Draft coverage, will call the 2010 NFL Pro Bowl and will serve as an analyst for ESPN Radio’s 2010 Rose Bowl and BCS title game broadcasts, where he will again team with MNF play-by-play caller Mike Tirico.

That means multiple more years of Gruden insight (“this guy’s a football player”) and in depth analysis (“this guy’s a running back”) on MNF. Personally, I can’t get enough of his inability to keep a straight face during those rare moments where the camera focuses in on the booth. Unprofessional, yes. A clear-cut indication that he’s just tuned Jaw’s out, why hell yes.

Gruden, ESPN agree to multiyear deal (ESPN)

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A team of crack geniuses from the blog No Mas produced an animated short about the no-hitter that Dock Ellis threw while trippin’ on acid. The audio is taken from an interview Ellis conducted with writer Donnell Alexander.

100 H/Tees to my man @AsilentFlute for sending this to me, because it is just so great.

One time I covered first base, and I caught the ball and tagged the base all in one motion. I said, “OOH, I just made a touchdown.”

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Brett Youmark, chief executive of the in limbo New Jersey Nets, tells Richard Sandomir of the NY Times, “From Day 1, we’ve had two strategies..One, to market ourselves as if we’re staying long term in New Jersey to give people a reason to come see us. But it’s important to seed our brand in Brooklyn.”

Not an easy strategy to execute considering how delayed and convoluted the Nets’ plan to move the team from New Jersey to Atlantic Yards in Brooklyn has become – they’ve kind of reached the “oh, geez, this is awkward” phase in their relationship with Jersey.

Made easier, however, when you got guys like Devin Harris, who’s willing to do a promotional appearance in the bread aisle at Pathmark.

Sandomir on Harris:

His off-the-court schedule shows that he had breakfast with a hero police officer at a Dunkin’ Donuts in Hackensack, N.J., helped clean Branch Brook Park in Newark before its Cherry Blossom Festival and took a cooking class at Fabulous Foods in Moonachie, N.J., with youngsters from Big Brothers Big Sisters of Morris, Bergen and Passaic counties.

Harris drove an eighth grader in Hawthorne, N.J., to school in his Ferrari, appeared with Nets center Brook Lopez at M&M’s World in Manhattan (M&M’s is the team’s official candy), conducted clinics, hiked, climbed rocks and bowled with youngsters.

The Ferrari, M&M’s, even sitting at a table signing photos at the Pathmark – none sound too strenuous. But everything adds up to him being the Net who’s made the most appearances in his just under two years with the team.

Not bad for a 26-year old who’s the marketing face of an organization mired in uncertainty. I like the attitude on this guy.

A Net Reaches Out to Fans, Wherever They Are (NYT)

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If the title of this post in anyway comes off as a slight of Gene Autry, or his prowess as a baseball man, then I apologize, and concede to it being cheap humor at that.*

The OC Register and AP report that Gene Autry is amongst this year’s candidates for induction into the Baseball Hall of Fame. The former and original owner of the Angels is part of a special “executives and pioneers” ballot that includes several other team owners as well.

Autry bought the expansion Angels in 1960, persuaded to do so by the management who were impressed by him buying the exclusive radio rights to the team. The OC Register’s Angels blog writes:

Autry was the Angels’ owner from the franchise’s inception in 1961 until his death in 1998, bringing many star players to Anaheim with his willingness to spend (particularly in the early years of free agency) — but only three division titles and no World Series appearances in that time.

The results of the Angels blog poll question: “Should Autry be in the Hall of Fame” are falling resoundingly in his favor.

Autry also served as Vice President of the Amercian League from ’82 until he died. In ’92, the Angels retired the #26 in his honor – baseball teams keep a 25-man roster, I think you can figure out why they gave Autry 26.

A 12 person committee of Hall of Famers, baseball writers and current and former executives will vote on the nominees, and the results will be released on Dec. 7. Separate voting and different committees decide the players’ and coaches’ ballots. Funny how it took Gene Autry for me to bother to figure out how Hall-of-Fame voting is decided.

*That disclaimer seemed necessary, given the wide readership of metalheads on this site.

(some information found via Wikipedia)

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