True geek alert #199: If you type Mark McGwire into your Google search, this is what shows up…
I think we’re going to be able to add ‘Mark McGwire and crying’ real soon.
At the moment, when you type Mark Mcgwire cr…Creatine is prompted before crying; I searched for Mark Mcgwire on Google, ask me anything.
The payoff to all this nonsense…hilarity.
I bet you thought that was going to be all legitimate, what with the AP chyron in there, right? Wrong again. To make up for it with something informative on the matter, check out SportsRadioInterviews.com’s post of Dave Henderson’s, former Mcgwire teammate with the A’s, interview today with ESPN 101 in St Louis:
Take it from someone who peruses frequently - there is never a shortage of asinine behavior happening on the sporting goods and sports memorabilia listings on Ebay. Take for instance, this joker, who’d ideally like you to pay $14 million dollars for an autographed pair of A-rod turf spikes. Or, if that’s too rich for your wallet, there’s a guy in Dallas who will sell you a two-field baseball complex for the Ebay buy-it-now price of $425,000.
Not far down the list from those featured items, you’ll find a serviceman from Fort Bragg, NC who, for the all-in price of $50,000 will sell you his arm- specifically, the space on it to buy advertising. This may well fit the profile of yet another dimwitted attempt at auctioneering, but at least hear this guy out…
I am trying to sell space on my arm, the complete and full arm. I have been having some small financial issues and I am really in need of some funds to help out my family and eliminate a few debts that have accumulated. My vehicle is running into the ground and I don’t make enough nor do I have the credit to just get one and start new. Please take this into consideration when reviewing this listing. I travel alot because of my job and I see many many people in many different places all over the country. But what I’m trying to accomplish here is to just raise a little money to help out my wife and my son with a little better of a life other than living from paycheck to paycheck every month.
The buy it now is what I’m asking for the entire arm covered in your own personal art advertising your business. This is what I wish to obtain for the entire arm, total. So if you want the entire arm then we are gonna have to talk along the BUY IT NOW price. If you don’t want the entire arm, but just a portion of my arm, then email with any questions and we can quite possibly work something out about certain areas. The only thing that I ask is for you to be respectful, I WILL NOT TATTOO ANYTHING THAT IS RACIST, GANG RELATED, OR COMPLETELY DISRESPECTFUL TO INDIVIDUALS OR ANY NATION ESPECIALLY OURS. I am in the Army and I do have regulations that I have to adhere by, also being in the Army allows for mass advertisement. Every time someone you know gets new ink it is always the talk of the town. Please if you are interested send me a message and we will talk about specifics. Thank you and happy bidding or buying.
The only other hard facts we know about this guy is that the person who posted this, presumably his wife, goes by armywife8606 - and she’s received a 100% customer satisfaction rating on ebay. That, and the $50,000 is pretty much nonnegotiable if you want the whole arm, but if you only want quote: “a certain measurement of your logo to be plastered on my skin” he’s willing to discuss pricing.
I’ve had a hard time wrapping my head around this guy’s desperation. I want to give him the benefit of the doubt that he’s sincere in his extreme measures - assuming such, doesn’t $50,000 for a permanent advertisement seem a little low? This is the age-old problem with buying online and ebay specifically, it’s hard to get the full-story on what you’re bidding on.
This is probably as good an example of a misuse of an e-commerce website as someone trying to sell a baseball diamond. And unfortunately, I believe that the likelihood of arm ads getting sold online is as likely as someone shilling out $15 million for that lipstick wearer’s turf shoes. Still, I won’t call your methods asinine, armywife8606’s husband. Weird, clearly. But regardless, whatever your situation I hope things start looking up for you and your family, and you can take your forearm off ebay.
A team of crack geniuses from the blog No Mas produced an animated short about the no-hitter that Dock Ellis threw while trippin’ on acid. The audio is taken from an interview Ellis conducted with writer Donnell Alexander.
100 H/Tees to my man @AsilentFlute for sending this to me, because it is just so great.
One time I covered first base, and I caught the ball and tagged the base all in one motion. I said, “OOH, I just made a touchdown.”
If the title of this post in anyway comes off as a slight of Gene Autry, or his prowess as a baseball man, then I apologize, and concede to it being cheap humor at that.*
The OC Register and AP report that Gene Autry is amongst this year’s candidates for induction into the Baseball Hall of Fame. The former and original owner of the Angels is part of a special “executives and pioneers” ballot that includes several other team owners as well.
Autry bought the expansion Angels in 1960, persuaded to do so by the management who were impressed by him buying the exclusive radio rights to the team. The OC Register’s Angels blog writes:
Autry was the Angels’ owner from the franchise’s inception in 1961 until his death in 1998, bringing many star players to Anaheim with his willingness to spend (particularly in the early years of free agency) — but only three division titles and no World Series appearances in that time.
The results of the Angels blog poll question: “Should Autry be in the Hall of Fame” are falling resoundingly in his favor.
Autry also served as Vice President of the Amercian League from ‘82 until he died. In ‘92, the Angels retired the #26 in his honor - baseball teams keep a 25-man roster, I think you can figure out why they gave Autry 26.
A 12 person committee of Hall of Famers, baseball writers and current and former executives will vote on the nominees, and the results will be released on Dec. 7. Separate voting and different committees decide the players’ and coaches’ ballots. Funny how it took Gene Autry for me to bother to figure out how Hall-of-Fame voting is decided.
*That disclaimer seemed necessary, given the wide readership of metalheads on this site.
Depressed about the prevailing of evil last night? Suggesting cockamamie like: the Phillies should have pulled Pedro with an 0-2 count on Matsui in third? Well, it gets worse.
Before you go into your no-good Yankee-loving boss’s office and try to shatter him by asserting that rooting for that organization lowers him as a businessman, you should unfortunately know that the Yankees haven’t been operating under the commonly failed business practices that some of us assumed all along.
David Goldman, of CNNMoney.com and loyal Red Sox fan, reluctantly reports this morning that the Yankees ran one of the most efficient operations in the league this year:
Adding up the dollars and cents. Applying a Society of Baseball Research metric, the Yankees were actually more efficient with their payroll this past season than were the hapless cross-town Mets, Cleveland Indians and basement-dwelling Washington Nationals.
The World Champs were only slightly less thrifty with their salaries than the Chicago Cubs, Houston Astros, and Kansas City Royals, all of whom missed the playoffs.
By those calculations, the Yankees paid $3.2 million per “marginal victory.” That’s nearly twice as efficient as the Mets, who only won 70 games despite their $149 million payroll and paid $5.8 million per marginal victory.
In addition, a rough estimate of the team’s revenue in 2009 shows the Yankees cashed in on their success more than any other team. Multiply the number of people coming to games by the average ticket price ($73),and the Yankees took in about $270 million this season, or $69 million more than they shelled out for their payroll.
Sigh. However, if you’re a New Yorker and a Yankee hater - the pinnacle of the unbiased majority in this debate, right? - take solace in an undeniable fact. What primarily helped the Yankees develop this business model are the ticket, food, and merch sales contained within that billion dollar stadium. And, if the stadium doesn’t get built, the Yankees wouldn’t be able to leverage the astronomical price mark up of those items. And if the government subsidies for the stadium that came down don’t, then the stadium don’t get built. Whether you’re a Yankee fan or not, if you’re a New Yorker you’re unwillingly paying down that grant money, and in turn fueling the stadium funds that helped pay player salaries and the luxury taxes attached to those salaries.
And, as Goldman points out, it’s a sad reality and it’s working - but on paper, in no less evil of a fashion than before.
SportsRadioInterviews.com posted the skinny from Joe Girardi’s interview with Mike Francesca on WFAN today. Couple of intriguing thoughts swirling around in the manager’s well-bic’d noggin approaching game time - he’d be willing to throw Mariano for 45 pitches and isn’t ruling out bringing him in in the seventh inning.
“Well yeah you are going to think about that.I mean you think about if you can get him to throw one pitch per batter we could start him too.
Mariano threw 39 pitches and got two innings worth of outs in Game 2, but as Tom Verducci pointed out on SI.com, that was a rare feat:
It was the most pitches he has thrown in a game in two years. Of the 74 times Rivera has pitched in the postseason since he became a closer, he has thrown more than 39 pitches only two times, and both were in potential clinchers: the epic 48-pitch outing in 2003 ALCS Game 7, and the 40 pitches in the Yankees’ ill-fated 2004 ALCS Game 4.
Frankly, for once, I’d like to see it come down to who’s coming up - like say, Utley, Howard, Werth in the top of the seventh? For example, Purist Bleed Pinstripes posted an interesting analysis on Facebook of why Mariano, the best reliever on the team, should have been brought in to face Hunter, Guerrero and Morales in Game 5 of the ALCS. And as an aside, Mo went 2+ in that 13-inning affair that was Game 2 of the ALCS. How great if Chase Utley slithers out of the dugout to face Rivera tonight prior to the beer being shut down? (You then see veins start to exponentially appear on Girardi’s well bic’d temples with every foul ball.)
Only a few hours till we’ll know which way this goes. Personally, I’m just trying to get the word out on this so that whatever he does we can hopefully second guess the guy tomorrow. Enjoy the game, keep it going Phillies!
At the time of me scribing this piece of inconsequence, incarcerated Boston Red Sox fan Randy Aaron Baker is preparing for his temporary release from Van Buren County Jail so that he can attend today Sox game against the Royals in Kansas City.
Randy Aaron Barker is serving a 10-day jail sentence for interference with official acts and violation of a protective order. He is also a big fan of the Boston Red Sox.
According to the Ottumwa Courier story, Barker’s attorney, Margaret E. King, Barker petitioned the court to allow him to attend the Red Sox game in Kansas City with his father and brother. They have had long-term plans to attend, King told Magistrate Judge Benny Waggoner.
Baker is set to return late tonight or tomorrow to the clink - whenever, right? What’s an “official act” anyway?
There’s a word in the quote that seems both appropriate, yet glaringly absurd. Petition. As in, some judge spent the time to hear a petition for a short time criminal to go to a baseball game - and a meaningless one at that. The lawyering time would have been better spent coming up with some sort of fining scale to be levied against people who buy tickets to Royals games in September.
Just goes to show you, for every Midwest magistrate being run roughshod by unbridled serial killers acting out of boredom, there’s lawmen who have too much time on their hands.
Baseball Fan Released From Jail To See Game (KCCI.com)
Before we give the Giants too much guff, I think we owe them a little deeper analysis on this. For one thing, Anchor Steam (a San Fran local sold at the park) is legit. And also, I don’t really buy this report.
First off, the beer figures have a footnote attached to them that reads: Team restructured seating categories or made retroactive changes to 2008 prices. Some of the 2008 numbers used do not match up with previously reported figures.
Anyone?
What I can tell you is that the Mets’ price figure that says you pay $5.00 for a 12 oz. is, well, a sick joke (because i’d love to get my hands on a $5 beer at a Mets game). I’ve been to Citi Field five times during the 2009 campaign, and I’ve purchased beer in every possible manner, minus the ritzy V.I.P. bar, which looks like a suite at The Palms resort and casino - I doubt this is where they are hiding the $5 special. I’d wager that Yankee stadium attendees would take similar offense to the assertion that they’re paying $6 for a 12 oz.
I’d say the average Mets beer at Citi floats you about $7. This includes the 16 oz. pounders of Bud and Bud Light, and the wide array of microbrews sold in 12 oz. cans. The 12 oz. domestics you can get up in the stands run $6. If that mumbo jumbo from above is supposed to translate to mean we’re looking at 2008 prices, then it bares noting that actually the prices at Citi Field are on average lower this year than at Shea in 2008 ($7.50 for those 12 oz. Buds). So don’t feel too bad for yourselves, Giants fans, because something is absent here with the numbers.
The Diamondbacks came in with the low number at $4.00 for their beer served in metric 14 oz. cups.
In the Holiday hierarchy, I put Fourth of July at a strong #5 (after Halloween, Thanksgiving, New Years Eve and Bulletproof Saturday). It’s a very solid holiday. The three best things about Independence Day in reverse order…
3.) Coolers of Domestic Canned Brews
2.) Freedoms, F#ck yeah
1.) Copious amount of hot dogs, Double F#ck yeah
Fireworks are overrated. In honor of the official wiener holiday, I feel compelled to recognize the athletes that bring showmanship to that upper echelon of arrogance known as hot doggin’ here are your top five in no particular order:
Deion Sanders
Chad Johnson, Steve Smith, his former-teammate and brother in hot doggin’ Michael Irvin, they could all make a case for being the biggest NFL hotdog. In my opinion, Deion was the original and no one did it better.
Deion raises you the “Deion Sanders Hot Dog Express,” Chad.
Ricky Davis
Deion is a great example of why hot doggin’ is not necessarily detrimental to one’s performance. Ricky Davis, is not. He’s basically Wesley Snipes in White Men Can’t Jump playing against better guys. Also, Reggie Miller is my runner-up for basketball hot-doggin’.
Manny Ramirez
Not as much of a cautionary tale of hot doggin’ it as Davis, but pretty damn close. Manny invented and constantly toes the line between hot doggin’ and foolishness. Interested to see if he keeps it up when he makes it back from suspension jail purgatory.
Alexander Ovechkin
The guy scored 52 goals in his rookie season. Plus, Wale made him the first hockey player to be mentioned in a rap song (Do it for the capital, Wale Ovechkin). He can start breakdancing after goals if he wants, if you ask me.
Ronaldo
Kind of a darkhorse for the top five, Ronaldo is actually a hot dog tandem threat.
Hot dog showman on the pitch…
Nice eventual pass out of the box, Fancy Feet.
And hot dog…connoisseur, shovel, black hole. Double points for being a fatty fat fat.
Honorable Mention:
Kobayashi, just because the guy’s sport could be called hot-doggin’. He is probably gonna be like “dude, really?” once he realizes he didn’t make the top five. I personally find his performances to be cerebral at best.
