You Can’t Be Serious?! John McEnroe, aka Johnny Mac, aka Tantrums, is going to once again return to the courts next year in Zurich.

This isn’t going to affect his budding pitchman career, is it?

Brewers Sausage getting PWNED 4-28-09 (PWNED Video)
Sexy Female MMA Fighters (Gunaxin)
Mariano Rivera: Sign Of The Times? (Josh Q. Public)
Holiday Special: Bad Ass Mothers (Hugging Harold Reynolds)
The 10 Best Goalie Fights You’ve Ever Seen (In Game Now Blog)
Ron Artest Says He’s Poor And His Team Sucks (Total Pro Sports)
Are there any good guys left in baseball? (Paneech)
Irish Army Banned From Playing Soccer & Volleyball In Chad Because The
Ground Is Too Hard (Sports Rubbish)

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I haven’t done a link dump in a dog’s age. And that is definitely a school I am not too cool for. These are brought to you by the legendary Ol’ Dirty Bastard, R.I.P. and Shimmy Shimmy Ya.

Five Golfers We Hope Pull A Henrik Stenson (And Five We Don’t) ( Sports Rubbish )
It Always Rains In Pac-land ( Total Pro Sports )
Will Ferrell “We Are Marquette” ( NESW Sports )
Michael Phelps on Today Show Talks about his “Mistake;” Doesn’t Actually Admit what “Mistake” Was ( Hugging Harold Reynolds )
Ovechkin Continues To Flex Big Giant Muscles ( Josh Q. Public )
Using a middle finger to referee ( Intentional Foul )
Even sluts embrace social media to find work ( 9-to-Fried )
Uh oh… Marko Jaric is in trouble… ( Epic Carnival )
IOWA PLAYER FINISHES SEASON WITH ZERO FREE THROW ATTEMPTS ( The World of Isaac )
Cramer and Stewart Go Head to Head … Awkward ( Brahsome )

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I am legitimately worried about this guy’s career peaking too early.

Japanese phenom Ryo Ishikawa became the youngest golfer to win on any tour at the age 15, and at age 17 has already risen up the ranks to #60 in the World. Not to mention he finished 5th overall in the money last year.

He’s a phenom festival, plus he looks like he’s going to unleash a tornado whirlwind kick after he’s done reading this green

I’m sure he could have just called somebody if he wanted to get exempt for stateside PGA event this year, but before he had the chance to do that Arnold Palmer played his consummate golf legend card and took matters into his own hand.

According to PGAtour.com, Palmer sent Ishikawa a personalized letter asking him participate in the Arnold Palmer Invitational at Bay Hill (March 23-26). Ishikawa, known also as ‘the shy prince’, graciously accepted and will be one of two exempt players who will get to compete against a top-ranked field next March that could include Tiger Woods, who could potentially return to tour action by then.

(Japanese phenom accepts Palmer’s Bay Hill invitation)

Government Mandated Playoff? I Don’t Think So (The World According to Moondog)
ESPN Fixes Up Sunday Night Baseball Broadcast… By Adding Steve Phillips?! (Sharapova’s Thigh)
HHR’s Penthouse Forum…Win a PEPSI SUPERBOWL PRIZE PACK (Hugging Harold Reynolds)
Titans QB Collins added to Pro Bowl roster (FoxSports.com)
When A Blonde Backs Caboose Into Scott Van Pelt (Busted Coverage)
The NBA’s midseason report card – Hot or not style (Cuzoogle)
Kevin Johnson said he would skunk Barack Obama, Video (NESW Sports)
Z-Trip’s “The Victory Lap: The Obama Mixtape Part 2″ (Music For Perfect People)
In Mild Upset, Red Sox, Jonathan Papelbon Avoid Arbitration Hearing (Fanhouse)
How To Defend Against A Bear Hug (Barstool Sports)

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Low Vs. Diamond was totally worth braving the elements for last night. Phase one of my musical odyssey this weekend es completa. Weezy F. Baby tonight!

Here’s Low Vs. Diamond’s video for Heart Attack, which is pretty wild. And also check out their performance on Leno here.

( www.myspace.com/lowvsdiamond )

VITAMINWATER NOT SO SEXY AFTER ALL (With Leather)
+1000 For Alex Trebek (Awful Announcing)
Jerryd Bayless Is Nasty (Intentional Foul)
There’s a Mike Tyson documentary coming out? (Epic Carnival)
The Fake Joba Chamberlain Gave A Woman His Fake High Heater (Don Chavez)
Spanish Prison = Kick Ass (Brahsome)
And Then There’s JJ (And One)
The Temp does: The return of “The Office” (9 to Fried)
Take That, Most Dominant Player On Earth! (Tirico Suave)
LIONS HIRE JIM SCHWARTZ (The World of Isaac)

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Easily the best performance in recent times by an athlete with a truly unfortunate name. University of Kentucky guard, Jodie Meeks, dropped 54 points last night, going 10-15 from behind the arc, to lead the Wildcats to a 90-72 victory over Tennessee.

Jodie as in Jodie, the name for females. Meeks as in meek – or docile, submissive, milquetoast. Or Meeks, as in Steven “me and Meeksy are working on a hi-fi system” Meeks from Dead Poets Society.

Frankly, the name Sheryl Miller sounds tougher to me, but there’s no denying that this guy got it done. Check out the highlights:

(c/o Sports by Brooks)

Here are 12 movies screening at Sundance that you should know about (via Pop Candy)
Darius Miles Stuffs Himself (Blaze of Love)
The Most Important Conversation Ever…Continued (Sharapova’s Thigh)
Sblog Tweets Promotes Sports Bloggers Content (The World According to MoonDog)
KSK Suicide Pools: And Then There Was One (Kissing Suzy Kolber)
Scott Pioli Takes the Chiefs GM Job (Barstool Sports)
Snowboarder Owned By Table (Phil Knows Best)
Seattle: Where Banging Your Students Is Totally Kosher (Brahsome)
Kate Hudson’s ass is still talking to me (on205th Magazine)
Giants’ Fans Unleash Verbal Abuse On Eagles’ Fans (Busted Coverage)

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Stud FSU Safety/ would-be NFL Draft selection/ Rhodes Scholar for da dolla! Myron Rolle announced today that he’ll pursue Med School at Oxford instead of going pro.

Astute move, Rolle. I keep telling myself that I too decided to delay when I’d be receiving my truckloads of cash in life.

Now check out the video for the Myron Rolle action figure.

( Florida State star picks Oxford over NFL draft )

Late 80s/Early 90s Sports Apparel Fashion Confessions (The Legend of Cecilio Guante)
Detroit Police Department Exhibits Kindness (The World According to MoonDog)
Griffin could miss all of 2009? (Cagewriter – Yahoo! Sports)
T-Mac Taking a Two-Week Break (Slam Online)
THE 10 BEST SPORTS MOVIE COACHES (The World of Isaac)
Cuzoogle’s Crush of the week – Carly Pope (Cuzoogle)
MLB Network’s “Hot Stove” Blows Away ESPN’s “Baseball Tonight” (Sharapova’s Thigh)
The A.V. Club interviews Flight of the Conchords’ Bret and Jermaine (The A.V. Club via Pop Candy)
2009 NFL Championship Cheerleaders (The Guy Report)
Flying Man (NY Hoosier)

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In an attempt to shed their obscurity ’round campus, the UCLA Women’s Rugby team hosts an annual prom dress rugby match, with their third ever happening this past weekend…

Not to be confused with the thrift store three-piece suit match…hosted each year by the UCLA water polo team. Or the bikini car wash that the UCLA cheerleaders are perpetually running in my wildest dreams.

( UCLA Women’s Rugby )

The Broncos Bring In An Offensive Genius To Be Head Coach… Why? (Sharapova’s Thigh)
Joey Graham is The Wrestler (Cuzoogle)
Cat Fight! Beyonce vs Janet Jackson (MoonDog Sports)
NFL Teams Desperate For Good Running Backs (Gunaxin)
Charles Barkley got his golf swing fixed by Tiger Woods coach Hank Haney (NESW Sports)
Coach Dungy to Retire From The Colts (In Game Now)
Dallas, TX: Dining in Big D (Fan Foodie)
I just want to bang on the desk all day (9 to Fried)
Hardcore Sitting (Don Chavez)
Janeane Garafolo is Hot??? (Brahsome)

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Bet you didn’t think that Kung Fu Friday would fall so early in the Calendar year. Think again my little Shaolin swordstylists!

And I’ve got a special Kung Fu Friday surprise coming your way later on, so keep your head firmly on a swivel and check back with the SB dojo in the P.M.

A cache of Kung Fu Friday pics after the links…

(Kung Fu Fridays blog)

Someone you can’t recall added you as a friend on Facebook… (This is Illuminati)
Florida’s Major Wright Knocks OU’s Manny Johnson The F*** Out (MoonDog Sports)
Michael Jordan on Michael Jordan And His New Shoe – Sports Biz with Darren Rovell (CNBC.com)
Florida Gators, 2009 BCS National Championship Game Highlight Videos (NESW Sports)
Batmalard vs. The Clown Plince of Clime. WHO YA GOT? (Kissing Suzy Kolber)
I Hate Florida (Barstool Sports)
Band Shots Down During The BCS Title Game, Announcer Idiocy Up (Awful Announcing)
The Difference is Interceptibility (The Big Lead)
Tim Brando To Radio Caller: You Shut The Hell Up (SportsByBrooks)
Motivational Posters: Redux (Brahsome)

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Some cool hell on wheels news of the International persuasion, women’s flat-track squads from Birmingham (UK) and Stuttgart (Deutschland) will face off at the end of the month in Germany. The teams met in the first ever European cross-border battle in November ’08, with Birmingham giving Stuttgart the business, edging out a victory 81-75. They’ll rematch on Jan. 31 in the New Year’s Massacre.

Check out the Birmingham Blitz Derby Dames and Stuttgart Valley Roller Girlz team sites for more info

…Now, on to a plethora of what’s happening…

Border Wars: College Football Recruiting Battles (MoonDog Sports)
BAR IS SOMEWHAT ATTRACTIVE (What Would Tyler Durden Do)
UK Rugger Gets His License Suspended for Three Years for Drunk Driving (Telegraph)
Will Yankees Luxury Suite Controversy Topple Bloomberg Administration? (Deadspin)
Aziz Ansari, Comedian (Gothamist)
Top 10: Music Blogs to Read in 2009!… Including one of my personal favorites Earfarm (via Pop Candy)
Danny Granger’s Three at the Buzzer: ‘You’ve Got to Be Kidding Me’ (Fanhouse)
Lil Wayne on ESPN’s 1st and 10… The Whole 22 Minutes! (Phil Knows Best)
Unlike Josh Hamilton, Chris Andersen Is Comfortable In His Inky Skin (Tirico Suave)
Who will score down under? Australian Open women’s odds (Cuzoogle)
Jon Stewart on Gaza (NY Hoosier)
NFL Year In Review (Intentional Foul)
Bored? Let Diamond Dave get you through the day (9 to Fried)
Noelia’s got some serious backside (on205th)
CHEERLEADER CAPTION CONTEST: WIN A OKLAHOMA SOONERS GREATEST GAMES DVD (The World of Isaac)

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Hip-Hop’s leading paper chaser turned ESPN.com blogger, Lil Wayne, is now podcasting too. You can check it out here: “Tim Tebow has a chip on his shoulder the size of a funyon,” brace yourself for 5+ minutes of shout outs towards the end.

During the first of the two fresh podcasts put up yesterday, Weezy had a message for favorite Major Leaguer, Manny Ramirez (i’m his number one fan, and his number two fan), saying if Manny goes to his hated Yankees he’s going to dedicate the best song on Tha Carter IV to reprimanding Manny (quote, if he goes blue, I’m off the mane train, mang).

Five-Year-Old Chef Gets His Own Show (NPR.org)
What’s Wrong With The Cavaliers? (Waiting For Next Year)
Top 10 Fictitious Wrestling “Hometowns” and the Athlete Most Likely to Hail From there (Hugging Harold Reynolds)
Five feature films now playing in the NBA (Cuzoogle)
Portland, OR: Ballin in the City of Roses (Fan Foodie)
Celebrity Buddhists Busted (City Rag)
Mickey Rourke Joins Cast of Stallone’s New Flick (via Pop Candy)
Amateur Assistance for Kerry Collins’s Amateur Musical Career (Kissing Suzy Kolber)

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