At the time of me scribing this piece of inconsequence, incarcerated Boston Red Sox fan Randy Aaron Baker is preparing for his temporary release from Van Buren County Jail so that he can attend today Sox game against the Royals in Kansas City.

Randy Aaron Barker is serving a 10-day jail sentence for interference with official acts and violation of a protective order. He is also a big fan of the Boston Red Sox.

According to the Ottumwa Courier story, Barker’s attorney, Margaret E. King, Barker petitioned the court to allow him to attend the Red Sox game in Kansas City with his father and brother. They have had long-term plans to attend, King told Magistrate Judge Benny Waggoner.

Baker is set to return late tonight or tomorrow to the clink – whenever, right? What’s an “official act” anyway?

There’s a word in the quote that seems both appropriate, yet glaringly absurd. Petition. As in, some judge spent the time to hear a petition for a short time criminal to go to a baseball game – and a meaningless one at that. The lawyering time would have been better spent coming up with some sort of fining scale to be levied against people who buy tickets to Royals games in September.

Just goes to show you, for every Midwest magistrate being run roughshod by unbridled serial killers acting out of boredom, there’s lawmen who have too much time on their hands.

Baseball Fan Released From Jail To See Game (KCCI.com)

This weekend, I’m making my long awaited return to Fenway Park – a place I haven’t been in over 10 years.

As a young lad, going to Fenway was a yearly ritual. I’m pretty sure my first game was during the 1990 season – the Roger Clemens era, yes, but also the Mike Greenwell and Jack Clark era. That was the season the Red Sox set the record for grounding into the most double plays (174). Now the Sox are better known for records like selling out every seat since 2003.

I’ll never forget that first game though. On the way in, taking the Green Line T from Framingham, MA, my Uncle Ronnie informed me that when someone on the opposing team strikes out you bound out of your seat and yell “Sit Down!” as menacingly and berating as possible. With my hat already nearly pulled fully over my eyes and a glove that may or may not have had velcro capabilities, my uncle probably thought it was more likely that I’d be asleep by the fourth inning.

Well, unless his true intentions were to create the most jawing 6-year old in New England that night, he should have never gave me those instructions. I’m pretty sure the game went into extra innings, and the Redx Sox pitchers K’d the opposition a few times during warm-ups too (how else could I have told no-less than 35 batters to “Sit down!!” – which is what I approximate).


I’m sure there’s backyard whiffle ball or youth league soccer glory from the late-80s documented on a beta-max in the attic, but I can’t really recall that. I remember vividly however giving the Red Sox opponents – let’s call them the Blue Jays (remember how annoying the early-90s Blue Jays were?) – the business though.

In honor of my sure-to-be triumphant return to Fenway…as well as punk little kids everywhere, I’m once again putting the sports blogger intelligentsia to task, and asking bloggers far and wide to send me a brief anecdote on:

My Earliest Sports Memory

I’ll post the best on Friday in A.M. (email: mikeehayes@gmail.com)

While you channel nostalgia check out photos of kids goofing off at sports events or engaged on the little tyke field of battle…

Hip-Hop’s leading paper chaser turned ESPN.com blogger, Lil Wayne, is now podcasting too. You can check it out here: “Tim Tebow has a chip on his shoulder the size of a funyon,” brace yourself for 5+ minutes of shout outs towards the end.

During the first of the two fresh podcasts put up yesterday, Weezy had a message for favorite Major Leaguer, Manny Ramirez (i’m his number one fan, and his number two fan), saying if Manny goes to his hated Yankees he’s going to dedicate the best song on Tha Carter IV to reprimanding Manny (quote, if he goes blue, I’m off the mane train, mang).

Five-Year-Old Chef Gets His Own Show (NPR.org)
What’s Wrong With The Cavaliers? (Waiting For Next Year)
Top 10 Fictitious Wrestling “Hometowns” and the Athlete Most Likely to Hail From there (Hugging Harold Reynolds)
Five feature films now playing in the NBA (Cuzoogle)
Portland, OR: Ballin in the City of Roses (Fan Foodie)
Celebrity Buddhists Busted (City Rag)
Mickey Rourke Joins Cast of Stallone’s New Flick (via Pop Candy)
Amateur Assistance for Kerry Collins’s Amateur Musical Career (Kissing Suzy Kolber)