This week in 1994, New York City kind-of- a rap group Fu-Schnickens released their second album Nervous Breakdown. It featured the hit single What's Up Doc? (Can We Rock) w/ a guest appearance from Shaq Fu, himself.
Shaq's adeptness at inventing halfwords – like alidocious – would not be fully appreciated until later in history…Lamar and Khloe tied the knock this weekend. (4 months; at least one very regrettable spin-off series.)
There were some real winners in attendance – Kelly Osbourne and Stuttering John Melendez’ gut.
But no one at the nuptials had swagger like Baron Davis.
I’m no fashion persona myself, but to quote my man Frank Slaughtery, did the ladies ever tell you you look like a f***ing optical illusion?
(H/T at J.E. “heartache to heartache” Skeets for this one)
Leading up to this past weekend’s inception of the 2009-10 NFL season, I polled the sports blogosphere on What’s the Greatest Sports Day of the Year. Thought we’d get a top-10 out of it, but it turns out everybody sort of likes the same days with a few wild cards thrown in. (Actually, just The Indy 500 sort of puzzles me.)
Therefore, here’s my highly arbitrary Top-5 based on the sports blog intelligentsia’s feedback.
Don’t forget to vote at the bottom…
Hanging out in a bar or ensconced on a couch with onion dip for 8-12 hours on a Sunday watching pro football is a truly iconic American experience. We wait all Summer for that experience, the whole time left to believe that sort of behavior is inappropriate and lethargic. Then, on a faithful Sunday in September – no matter what level of balmy Indian Summer weather we’re having – all your dreams come true, sloth. And, it’s not just one day, but the start of 5+ months of Sundays like this.
Here is Adam Best’s (Fansided.com) take on NFL opening day…
Not only is the NFL the professional sports league with the best product, it’s the sports league with the best presentation. After waiting for over half a year for the real thing, you get a taste of actual NFL regular season action on opening Thursday. That just wets your appetite for the 13 games on the Sunday slate. From tailgating to fantasy football, there isn’t a sports day that offers this much from start to finish. Christmas in September. Watching the Red Zone Channel for almost 7 hours before you switch over to NBC for the encore, and ESPN and the NFLN for the nightcap recap. From 8 AM until Midnight it’s all NFL. You can’t get non-stop action and highlights like that anywhere else.
I’ll take the sights at the local OTB on the day of the Kentucky Derby over any exploding fireworks spectacular. If they put an OTB there, even Mayberry would look like public squalor on Derby day. Utterly, fantastic.
But, to quote something The Cincinnati Kid Steve McQueen might have said – it’s not just the gambling, it’s also the drinking. You can muddle fruit everyday of the year, and it’ll never taste as well muddled as in a julep on Derby Day.
Also, you can wear a seersucker suit or a hat shaped like an extra large Triple Meat Italiano from Pizza Hut every day of the year, and people will always look at you with vague condescension, but at least on Derby Day they’ll have formulated an explanation as to why you’re dressed like a doofus.
I got more responses that read I know it sounds crazy, but I really enjoy the NBA Draft. Why so ashamed?
Two rounds, five minutes a pick (two minutes in the second round even), and all the wardrobe audacity that you could ask for in under three hours. I don’t think ESPN could get a more efficient display of unintentional comedy if they got Keyshawn, Kruk and Lou Holtz to tri-anchor SportsCenter live from Pamplona at the Running of the Bulls.
Answer: The first day when teams play each other in this sport is commonly referred to as Opening Day.
What is baseball, Alex. This would be a $200 dollar question in Jeopardy round. Under the category: Sports, amateur hour.
There’s a reason it’s Opening Day, and not Opening Sunday in the norms of society. And, the explanation might be that this is actually the greatest sports day of the year.
As Josh, from Josh Q. Public, puts it:
Hope springs eternal. Dads with their sons playing hookie from school and work, your first smells of the fresh cut infield and outfield grass, grilled ballpark franks, batting practice and ice cold beer…and then you go home that night to watch march madness…perfection.
I used to work with a guy who took Thursday and Friday of the NCAA tournament off every year, and went to Vegas with his buddies for the first round of the tournament. In a world where most of us lose vacation time do to sinister company policies, he’s an inspiration.
Interchangeably known as the least productive day of the corporate year, sports fans might actually be at their best and brightest these two days. There are 13 games on NFL Opening Sunday, and due to mitigating circumstances (spreads, fantasy players, food comas) you’re bound to let the outcome of one or two slip until Sport Center, Monday morning. Also, due to occurrences like Opening Day: Kansas City at Baltimore, you’re likely to not care about the full MLB slate on April 1. 32 teams play on each of the first two days of the tournament, and you will know the fate of every single one (and you won’t need to reference a fistful of sports book tickets to conjure up this knowledge).
Hit the poll to vote for the greatest sports day out of these five, and check out some other bloggers’ takes below…
Ethan Jaynes (NESW Sports)
I’ll give you a top eight…
1. Super Bowl Sunday
2. Opening Day Baseball
3. Game 7 ( MLB or NBA )
4. NFL Championship Sunday NFC AFC
5. The Big Dance Day 1
6. The Big Dance Final 4
7. The Big Dance Sweet 16
8. First Saturday of NCAA Football
Dan Adams (In Game Now)
Thanksgiving. The day progresses from pretending to be an athlete, to eating like an athlete, to sleeping & watching athletes.
Isaac (World of Isaac)
I used to love Thanksgiving…that was until Barry Sanders retired…now I regret going to the games
Zoner (Zoner Sports)
Hope springs eternal with the NFL draft.
Matt Clapp (Sharapova’s Thigh)
1st 2 days of the NCAA Tournament, NFL opening Sunday close second, then Baseball opening day close as well. After that, nothing is close for me.
Anthony Panici (Paneech.com)
The best sports day of the year for me is New Year’s day. I love college football and having it to watch from 11:00 in the morning until after midnight engrooses me every single year. The first two days of the NCAA Basketball Tourney run a close second, and baseball opening day is third.
Doug Sheckler (Epic Carnival, on205th.com)
First NFL Sunday, Super Bowl Sunday, First day of March Madness, Indy 500.Toss in MLB Opening Day as well
Joe Kinsey (Busted Coverage)
20 years ago – New Year’s Day.
Present day – Super Bowl Sunday. Nothing compares to 8 hours of eating and 3 hours of a game.
Kellex (Blaze of Love)
This is going to sound ridiculous, but one of my favorite days has always been the NBA All-Star game day/weekend. My birthday always happens to fall on that same weekend so I get to celebrate my bday along with my favorite sport’s all-star festivities.
From Toronto Raptors rookie, Demar Derozan’s blog today:
What’s going on everybody? A fan named Matthew Gardner made a hot video of my summer league highlights that I had to post on here. Since I’m from Compton, you already know what song he used for the soundtrack…
I think I do know.
At least I thought it was going to be Straight Outta Compton. That’s actually N.W.A.’s 100 Miles and Runnin.’
Demar’s well tuned mid-range game is definitely on display in this highlight reel – check out the baseline fadeaway about 1:10 in, with MC Ren adding: So for now pack the gun and Hold it in the air.
As Eazy E might say, lend Demar Derozan your muf#kin’ eyes and check out his Rookie Chronicles blog. He’s got some typical growing into my millions footage up there – himself picking up his first Escalade, sans rims for the time being.
A thief nabbed Baron Davis’ laptop recently, and apparently the computer contains some very private content that he’d rather not see the light of day. This prompted Baron to have his legal team send a preemptive strike of a letter to media outlets – the tone of the piece is so help me if you release these (in legal speak). Check it out at The Smoking Gun.
AUGUST 12–A laptop containing “a variety of private images” of NBA star Baron Davis has been stolen and the athlete’s lawyers are threatening legal action if the material is published. Counsel for the the Los Angeles Clippers guard, a two-time All-Star and novice film producer, yesterday sent news outlets a letter threatening legal action over the personal photos, videos, and audio stored on the computer.
For those in possession of the laptop and the TMZ’s of the world who would like to get a look at , forget the 12 million in salary Baron makes to afford top legal brass, he just produced a documentary about the Crips & Bloods.
If I was media that made deals with hoods, I wouldn’t tango with BD (and any source material he’s got looking out for him), but, of course Perez Hilton would - his advice: Scandalicious!!!..Whoever has got those goodies, get them out there quick! The world is officially waiting!
This is what happens when you spend $47 dollars at KFC and have to wait 18 minutes in the car for the chicken.
If you cut that off before Delonte and his hype man get the little call and answer going (hot sauce in my bag [extra] hot sauce in my bag [extra] ), please go back and watch.
This might be a KFC ad. Did you hear how he plugged the four different types of parfaits at the end?
Next time you hear someone say the word sauce, you’re going to laugh.
Delonte West’s Freestyle Ode to KFC (AOL Fanhouse)
The meticulous scribe of this article felt the need to clarify that O’Neal is an american basketball star and that his nickname is Shaq, leaving me to believe that The Big World Renowned is not one that we should so quickly add to O’neal’s stable of The Big nomenclature.
The real story here, is that since challenging Obama in person (roundball meets round-table on a healthcare reform) didn’t go so well the other day, Shaq resorted to the old standby to challenge David Beckham to a game of “soccerball.” It goes on…
And to entice Beckham on the show, O’Neal has decided to post a series of “tweets” calling on the England footballer to take up the challenge.
“Dear david beckham,” tweets Shaq. “I kno u heard about my Shaq Vs show, anyway u will never score a goal on me, I challenge you lil man.”
But Beckham failed to respond to the tweet, prompting another tweet from O’Neal: “David beckham I kno u hear me, dnt be scared, dnt make me call u out, u will never score a goal on me.”
O’Neal’s most recent tweet to Beckham read: “Dnt make me tweet to 2 million people that your scared of shaq, u betta respond, if u scared get a dog.”
There it is. The blow-by-blow on twitter, as reported by newspaperman. In related twitter news, Ocho Cinco doesn’t know what Levitra is.
David Beckham taunted by Shaquille O’Neal on Twitter (Telegraph)
Not making any accusations, but I curiously have Love Will Tear Us Apart by Joy Division swirling in my head while I ponder this. Just sayin…
A note to serious bidders (always wondered about how you place a non-serious, very jesting bid on one of these high priced item), he’ll also send you some of the add’l 130 photos from his collection not contained in the books.
Not swim fan enough for you yet?
The prized piece of the collection (of over 500 laminated sheets contained in eight books!) – Scrapbook #1: email sent to the Akron Beacon-Journal while Lebron was in High School asking why they weren’t covering Lebron more – it just got weird.
I’m no Sammy Columbo, but I’m guessing Kobe is going to at least get referenced? (And hopefully…capped.)
The Broadband Motion Picture Who Shot Mamba is being billed An Epic Nine Part Saga Told in 12 Parts. Sounds like the sort of irreverent and haphazard production that I could get behind.
Or you could just check out the plot summary:
When he’s accused of murdering a charismatic snake named Mamba, Merri Sherman sets into motion a chain of events that could result in the world’s takeover by a cult that worships a magic basketball, known only as the Orange Roundie. His only hope to stop this is by following the instructions of an ancient prophesy, which may also be predicting his own doom. (IMDB)
Some of the key players behind WSM:
Dustin Pearlman – the director, as noted on the IMDB page. Past projects he’s been involved in include: “30 Days of Night: Dust to Dust” and “Hood of Horror” (aka “Snoop Dogg’s Hood of Horror”)
Brian Spaeth – the writer, and a man who, if nothing else, deserves your adoration for owning the domain www.madpropstobakedpotatoes.com
Calvin Stadiums - the faux-likeness of the facebook profile linked up on WhoShotMamba.com, with interests such as having the world’s largest and most valuable collection of size D batteries.
Anxious to see how this plays out (hopefully, not in Kobe’s favor).
During a conference call to promote the upcoming American Century Championship Celebrity Golf Tournament in Lake Tahoe, ‘Zo expounded on the imminent NBA Championship victory of the Lakers. Let’s just say, if this were Good Will Hunting, Koby is Damon and Phil is Affleck…Casey Affleck.
Hear it..
He left out, “put me and a pair of tinted lenses on the sideline!”
Phil’s response..well, his response if I were Phil:
Time Out Alonzo, how many rings do you have as compared to my nine secured and tenth one fast approaching? what? WHAT?
The answer is of course, Alonzo got the single ring many moons ago with Miami in 1996. He’s also a 100/1 favorite to win the American Century Championship (July 14-19) in Nevada next month.
Rings talk. Plaid walks.
Alonzo Mourning bashes Phil Jackson (No Guts, No Glory)
Alonzo Mourning:Phil Jackson’s ‘Just Showing Up’ (Sports By Brooks)
Lakers take hold of series, down Magic in overtime (Balls Don’t Lie)
