My good friend Melfi put it nicely: “Was that the State of the Union last night, or Def Policy Jam?”

I’ll leave the hard-hittin’ Obama analysis to the real politicos. All I have to say about the speech – who was smart enough to DVR the SOTU while watching, affording them the chance to rewind and watch him say “that’s how budgeting works!” a myriad of times? (This guy!)

With my informed takeaways so blatantly and obviously limited, let me offer you this…Five Obama Pump Up Tracks For 2010!

Broken down by key points from his speech…

On “special earmark disclosure” online:

Paul Wall – I’ve got the internet going nutz

On U.S. to lead the charge on clean energy:

Jay-z – Get That Dirt Off Your Shoulder

On Republicans:

Iron Maiden – Run to the Hills

On Gov’t spending freeze:

Foreigner – Cold As Ice

On Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell being Repealed:

Diana Ross – I’m Coming Out

I’ll defend the paranoia of the Customs agents here. This does sound a wee bit sketch.

According to the AP, 1000 Obama bobbleheads have been held at a U.S. Customs and Border Protection warehouse since May 20. The dolls were en route to Charleston, West Virginia – home of Minor League baseball team the West Virginia Power, Single-A affiliate of the Pittsburgh Pirates who were planning to give them out at their game this Saturday. The Bobblehead is an Obama-likeness in his High School basketball uniform sporting the Punahou High blue and gold.

Power team spokesperson, Kristen Call, told the Associated Press it’s unlikely that the dolls will be released in time for the game, and the fans in attendance on Saturday will be given a voucher to receive their bobble head. While you wait for it to get mailed, I suggest you all open EBAY accounts in the meantime.

Saturday would have marked the first ever bobblehead night for the Power. It also probably marks the largest import operation of a Single-A baseball team not involving kraut for the concession stand.

Not saying we should start lighting these bobbles on fire and see if they blow, it’s just that we’re at Code Red here! (are we?)

Obama Bobbleheads Stalled In US Customs (4029tv.com)
West Virginia Power: website

Kudos Hulu. I thought I was going to spend the entire Inauguration asking CNN.com to bark like a dog for me, but you did the damn thing. And now I can move on to poppin’ champagne like we won a Championship game! (Later on actually, right now I’m celebrating with a chicken cutlet heroe with fresh mozzarella, prosciutto, basil, olive oil and balsamic vinaigrette – a sandwich that you cannot defeat, nor outlast).

Enjoy everybody. I believe it was Motley Crue who put it best when they said Little bit better than I used to be, ’cause I’m alive!

…And I believe it was Puffy who said, ‘Before you change the World, you gotta change yo’self.’ (Man, NOTORIOUS was terrible, and awesome, and ridiculous, and tragic all at the same time. See it.)

Now check out the audio and transcript of the inauguration speech courtesy of The Random Forest.

According to Petitionsite.com, Target Target Kenya, a tourism firm from the African region, is planning a ‘cultural extravaganza’ this month in an attempt to capitalize on the fervor for what they are calling the ‘Obama tourism circuit.’ Barack Obama’s father was Kenyan, and he is tremendously popular there (you can buy Obama Beer in Kenyan bars).

As a climax to the celebration, organizers are planning to hold a bull fighting event at Kasarani Stadium in Nairobi, much to the disdane of activist group ‘People Against Cruelty to Animals in Kenya.’

You can go here to check out their petition they plan to send to Hon Najib Balala, the Minister of Tourism in Kenya. But first, check out the chaotic scene of a traditional bullfight held in the Kakamega District of Western Kenya.

There’s something missing here… the toreador, right. Guess we’re not talking classic bullfighting.

VIDEO-JEFF GARCIA DATES HOT QUARTERBACKS (World of Isaac)
Redditteers, Check out BaconBuzz.com (Reddit.com)
Sophie Moon: Santa’s Naughty Helper (Moondog Sports)
Any Which Way But Lose (Celtics Blog)
The Top 8 Tracy Morgan Moments (via Pop Candy)

The people have spoken, and an overwhelming majority (45%) believe that Johnny Depp would be best served portraying Al Davis if he chose to delve into the sports biopic genre of cinema. (good call by Isaac on the submission)

Goodman as Madden. The dude whose playing Biggie Smalls in Notorious as Art Shell. Let’s get this thing greenlit!

Feel free to make other casting suggestions in the comments. Thanks to everyone who submitted and voted in the poll, be on the lookout for another on Friday!

Hollywood’s Top Up and Coming Actresses (Gunaxin)
If Sports Blogs were Chicks… (The Sports Dollar)
Holtz Quits ESPN, Replaces Col. Klink at Stalag 13 (Moondog Sports)
The Roots To Be Jimmy Fallon’s Band; We Are Old And Sad (via Pop Candy)
Obama Declares War on the BCS (Intentional Foul)

The New York Times posted a video report on the high school rugby team that has been called the Real All Blacks.

The team from the Hyde School, in D.C., was the first all-African American high school rugby team in the country, and remains one of the only inner city programs that exists.

The team went 0-12 their first year, and in the last four, Hyde has gone undefeated in 7-man play. They have even had one of their original members go on to represent the U.S. on the National team. And each player who completed the rugby program has gone on to college.

Check out two more news reports here from ABC (Australian Broadcasting Co.) and TV NZ….

NRA Protesting Treatment of Brett Favre (NE Patriots Draft)
Obama Could Have Basketball Court Built at White House (Associated Press)
NFL iPhone App Not Happening, Says The NFL (Alley Insider)
16-0, 0-16 Both Still Alive and Well (The Big Lead)
Will Matt Cassel Fetch $10 Million A Year? (Deadspin)

The country’s top eight female roller derby squads will square off next weekend in Portland, OR, with the title of Women’s Flat Track Derby Association National Champion on the line. The tournament will include teams from Texas, Philly, Chicago, Duke City? (Albuquerque, apparently), and of course the high-powered team from NYC known as the Gotham Girls. The Portland Expo Center is expecting upwards of 3,000 fans to come out for the event.

DerbyNewsNetwork.com has the official 2008 WFTDA Championship Bracket up on there site, and you can go log-in and edit and share your own bracket.

Stay tuned, as I try to find out if they’ll be any online or TV coverage of the tournament. And good luck, ladybadasses!

10 “great” fat guy moments in sports (on205th)
Kellex Morphs Again- The Blaze of Love Interview (And One)
Billy Mays… You, Sir Are On Notice (Buzz Pirates)
Obama, Taxes and the NASCAR Effect (Associated Content)
Natalie Gulbis Defending 3-Tour Challenge Championship (cfnews13. com)
Presidential exercising through the years (via mLive.com)

Throttling, I love that term. This is a great example.

Congratulations to Barack Obama, his family, and his colleagues in his camp – especially, Head Campaign Strategist David Axelrod, who will undoubtedly go down in history as running a brilliant campaign.

Looking back, I hope that Obama’s presidential run and subsequent lambasting of the GOP will be seen as the year that a campaign harnessed the power of bottom-up empowerment through technology the unleashed the real real America. Axelrod would probably say that this campaign is just the beginning of that new sensibility, and will pail in comparison to how candidates use the internet, social media, and one-to-one online voter outreach from here on out.

If you feel that you can afford to pull yourself away from today’s celebratory media coverage, check out the Rolling Stone cover story on Obama from last March – The Machinery of Hope. This is the piece that sealed me on Obama, and it does an excellent job of outlining the campaigning course that their camp committed too. I’m by no means a political science authority; someone like Nate Silver at FiveThirtyEight could probably point you to a much more in-depth dissertation on how team Obama did what they did. However, after yesterday’s flogging, this is reads like fun prologue. It’s like watching season four of The Wire again, after you’ve seen how Michael turns out at the end of season five.

Yes We Did! (Deadspin)
Get All That Political Talk Out of Your System (The Big Lead)
Go here to watch clips from “Indecision 2008″ (via Pop Candy)
Obama Wins Election, Covers Spread (Sports By Brooks)
Chris Bosh Congratulates Barack Obama, Video (NESW Sports)