Ken Thompson’s athletic CV will make you feel like a cumbersome sack of your preferred… just check out his stats:

• Has run a marathon in all 50 states
• Has run a marathon in 20 world capitals
• Has run marathons on all seven continents
• Also, competed in an Iditarod
• Also, one time ran 157 miles across Death Valley in the summertime.

I know I’m a lazy waste compared to this guy, who happens to be 72-years old and planning to run the Road Runners Marathon this weekend in Akron, OH.

Thompson is a member of the Oatmeal Millers, a marathon team where the average age is 73. On Saturday, they’ll compete in a five-person team relay marathon – after Thompson passes the baton, he plans to continue on and finish the full 26 miles.

“If you have five 20-somethings, that’s almost 100 years between them,” Thompson said. “With us, it’s over 365 years. We hope to finish in the top half of the relay teams and beat some of these younger guys.”

Forgot to mention his self-proclaimed “shortest run” ever – against the bulls in Pamplona. (This guy is a sicko. What a legend.)

Competing at an average age of 73, Oatmeal Milers still going strong (Cleveland.com)

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They had the white get-ups with the red sashes. They had the ole ole ole chants. But in lieu of available bulls, they went with roller girls equipped with whiffle ball bats.

NEW ORLEANS (AP) — It’s the running of the bulls, New Orleans style.

Hundreds of men, women and children, most in white with red scarves around their waists and red bandannas around their necks, gathered outside a French Quarter bar Saturday morning to be chased down Bourbon Street by members of New Orleans’ roller derby league.

Oh. Hell.Yeah.

During the first half of that video, I was like “who is wielding a chainsaw on bourbon street right now?” And then the Elvis impersonators showed up on their motor scooters.

“The energy of the runners was electric” Mudflap Girl observed. “It was a truly amazing feeling that hundreds of people were stoked that we were there, and stoked to have their azzes whupped by us!!

(I lifted that insight from the Big Easy Roller Girls blog… I could never with good conscience take credit for the use of the term azz (pl.))

… oh, again, the Elvi on mopeds, you can learn more about them at rollingelvi.com

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