After showing restraint for about 24-hours, I tried the Colonel’s new Double Down today. It’s something alright.

I hit the streets, along with blogger and appreciator of fast food innovation Brian Ries (Free Williamsburg, NBC). Good thing. Because after finishing just 80% of that sandwich, I think I blacked out on the walk back to the office, and may be still wandering around Union Square in a food coma if he wasn’t there to help guide me back.

We made it though. And the short review is we’re in agreement that everyone should try this once. Once only. Frankly, I don’t know if I want to meet the lunatic who eats two of these…or seven.

Here are five things you need to know before you eat the KFC Double Down:

Don’t rely on the wrapper

As advertised, in lieu of bread, KFC serves this in a wrapper. It’s supposed to be for the sake of decorum I assume – so you’re not just holding two pieces of fried chicken like a heathen. However, be prepared for cheese and grease to envelop the wax paper. Also, don’t wring it out when you’re done, you’ll hate yourself more.

Wait the allotted five minutes between bites

And furthermore, if it’s served to you piping hot like ours were, wait five minutes before you take that first bite.

Five minutes between bites may seem a little ridiculous. Well, Ries took two bites back-to-back and started imagining that the two filets once knew each other as chickens and had a conversation about ending up as a sandwich…the point is, eat this thing at a snail’s pace.

No need to get the combo

As they’ll tend to do, potato wedges and Dr. Pepper aren’t going to make this less of an arduous task.

Where does this rank on the fast-food chicken sandwich scale?

I’d rank it higher than the McDonald’s Premium Crispy Chicken Club, but far lower than the Wendy’s Spicy Chicken. The Double Down’s best attribute is the Colonel’s sauce, which has a little zip and you’re not going to find on any other sandwich on the market.

Post-DD heartburn scenario

I cheated. I had a Tum’s before I even had a single bite. It’s called fear.

Approximately 1:00 after consuming Ries’ state is such: “At first we were at zero, now we’re at a 3.5. I predict things going South from here.”

I don’t think South means back towards zero.

Check out Brian Ries’ review of the KFC Double Down on NBCNewYork.com

KFC Double Down

Who saw this coming (Not I), Brian Boitano’s Food Network show (What Would Brian Boitano Make?, premiering in August) could be brutally awesome.

Well, I’m in for at least one episode.

According to NBCBayArea.com, a recent episode shoot entailed WWBBD slugging bacontinis and hanging out with the Bay Area Derby Girls, San Fran’s Women’s Flat Track Roller Derby team.

Boitano’s production team was looking for subjects when they came across the Bay Area Derby Girls, our local flat track roller derby league, and wanted to do a show with them but wasn’t sure how to incorporate food into the mix.

Chesty Gillespie, number 34DD of the Oakland Outlaws (of which my wife, Deadly Nightshade, is a starting blocker), was asked if she had any ideas of how to do a segment for the show and she said that roller girls love bacon. In fact, many of them, Gillespie included, have bacon tattoos!

I like the throw it on the wall and see what sticks, Rock N’ Roll production strategy of the Boitano camp. And as a thank you gesture, Boitano is inviting the Derby girls over for a multi-course meal of bacon at his San Francisco home.

Boitano, the master of pork chivalry, indeed. (run with that one if you like…)

For context purposes,

This is a bacontini…



This is a Chesty Gillespie…

And this is the South Park gem that, in my opinion, allowed Boitano to maintain the inkling of cachet that earned him a shot at a Food Network show…

Watch more NETLOG videos on AOL Video

Brian Boitano, Food Network Star? (The Food Section)

Boitano, Bacon and Booze, Oh My! (NBC Bay Area)

The Post-Election episode of South Park was brilliant. Hat tip to Melfi at NYHoosier for the link to watch it online.

Movie Mash-Ups We’d See (or at least see half of) (Banned in Hollywood)
Sarah Palin to star in sequel to Out of Africa (Cuzoogle)
The All Whitey Basketball Team (Gunaxin)
Get a Soccer Lesson w Beckham: A Bargain For Only $40,000 (InGameNow)
Hall & Oates sue in N.Y. over ‘Maneater’ recording (via Pop Candy)

The twelfth season of South Park has been oh so sweet, and yet another fresh episode airs tonight.

If you’re kind of a big deal like myself and can’t always be around at 10 p.m. on Wednesday, check out where you can watch every single episode (beautiful) ever created.

Here’s a musical moment from the show’s past, I can’t remember laughing harder during South Park then the first time I saw this…

Concerning YouTube…The Today Show has been covering this story about the 16-year old girl who was beaten up on camera by a bunch of her supposed girlfriends.

The she-thugs then put the video on YouTube…shocking.

This morning, The Today Show put together a panel to discuss how awful this whole thing is, and the disturbing trend in kids posting violent video in search of their “15 MBs (clever?) of fame.”

Interestingly enough, on YouTube’s most viewed today page a news video of the beating loaded by user AssociatedPress has 226,065 views…today.

So, we’ve got trusted, reputable media source The Today Show condemning kids for doing this with violent videos, and trusted, reputable media source The Associated Press…What? Fueling the fire?

In their defense, AssociatedPress has removed the video.

…and some of my favorite (at least by name) YT users who have picked up the slack in posting these girls’ story include CuddlyNutBear, SockPuppetry101, and JUMPTHECOOCH.

An emerging voice of reason in this whole sordid affair…a YouTube comment posted 12 seconds ago:

WHAT THE F#$% IS THIS SH*T!!!!!!!!!!!!
Those girls should be punished!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You don’t do that to some one just because you have a disagreement or she said something to offend you. COME ON PEOPLE THIS IS F#$%ED.

says lesbianloveaffair