Just because the track is no longer slanted, does not mean the semantics of competition can’t be. For example, instead of conventional cheerleaders hell on wheels has….jeerleaders!
These diabolical pep mavens are sort of a cross between the Knicks City Dancers (if they were all tatted up) and the creatures that comprise the Raiders fan base.
Your boy young MH will be competing in this week’s IRON REF competition over at Hugging Harold Reynold’s.
Go check out The Chief’s intro to this week’s showdown, and see my bio – forgot to mention the detail that I’ve had exactly zero haircuts in ’08. The secret ingredient is divine intervention and the posts go live on Wednesday! The only hint I’ll give out: Weezy, baby!
I’ve been slacking on here, but this aught to redeem myself at least a little…
ALBION — No one struck out when it came to playing a marathon whiffle-ball game over the weekend for charity and a scholarship fund…They recorded the marathon on tape. It began at 7 p.m. Friday and ended at about 7 p.m. Saturday. (Whiffle-ball game for charity lasts 24 hours, sets record – Erie Times-News)
I think these stats speak for themselves…
Final Score: 935 – 514, the game ended in the top of the 149th inning (there was no need for the home team to bat in the bottom half…with a 421 run lead)
According to one of the player’s wives, some players hit 150 to 200 home runs (with a 64-foot fence, she’s probably not exaggerating that bad)
The players raised $1500 for charity, and (surprise, surprise) they could find themselves in the Guinness Book of World Records.
His name is Frank “El Ingles” Evans. He’s 66 years-old, and the only living English bullfighter.
He’s slain over 300 bulls in his 40+ year career. This past weekend, he got back in the ring for the first time in three years since having a knee replacement and quadruple bypass heart surgery.
Another unsubstantiated rumor crashes and burns…Turns out Radiohead did not contribute the entire score to Choke, the film based on the Chuck Palahniuk novel that opens in theaters Sept. 26.
All is not lost, however. Radiohead is indeed releasing a brand new tune for what looks to be a strong soundtrack:
Choke Soundtrack tracklist (being released Sept. 23 exclusively for digital download):
1. Ben Kweller – “The Rules” 2. The Natural History – “Don’t You Ever” (rare) 3. Fiery Furnaces – “Navy Nurse” 4. Radiohead – “Reckoner” 5. Alap Momin – “Sin Terror” 6. Clap Your Hands Say Yeah – “Satan Said Dance” 7. Buzzcocks – “Orgasm Addict” (rare) 8. Death Cab for Cutie – “No Sunlight” 9. Blitzen Trapper – “Wicked” (unreleased) 10. Ms. Tyree Sugar Jones – “If You Feel It” 11. My Morning Jacket – “Touch Me I’m Going To Scream Pt 1″ 12. Shout Out Louds – “Bicycle” (rare) 13. Twilight Singers – “There’s Been An Accident” 14. Nicole Atkins – “Crystal Ship”
Hell on wheels was graciously brought forth by a gentleman named Leo Seltzer, who after reading a magazine article that said 93% of Americans had, at one point in their life, roller skated decided to launch the sport.
Seltzer’s first iteration of Roller Derby had folks skating around an oval track for as many as 11-hours, in marathon races meant to simulate the 3000-mile distance between Los Angeles and New York.
The distance was quickly scaled back and the team concept was also adapted. The ruthlessness has always been encouraged, with five minute sprint races – which often saw elbows being thrown and collisions taking place – being inserted during the early derbies for extra prize money.
The first gold medal will be give out on Saturday…in an event with guns! (umm, awesome?) The home country could jump out to the early lead in the medal count, as China’s Du Li is expected to take gold in this event – the Women’s 10-Meter Gat-off. (fine, it’s actually called the 10 m. Air Rifle)
Expectations for this snipette couldn’t be higher, as China dominated the 2004 shooting events – winning four golds, nine medals in total. The pressure is so intense that her coach hired Du – who took gold at Athens – a psychologist leading up to the competition.
The Loot officially starts being handed out Saturday Morning when IOC President Jacque Rogge will present the medals himself to the winners of Women’s Air Rifle.
“In 2006, the World Adult Kickball Association (WAKA) sued upstart DC Kickball, claiming that founder and former WAKA officer Carter Rabasa had stolen the association’s proprietary rules and then defamed WAKA by calling it “the Microsoft of kickball.” Offended and pouting, WAKA demanded $356,000 in damages. Had the legal recourse existed for it, they likely would have forced Rabasa to play bocce for the rest of his life.” (DCist)
A motion filed in April by both sides to dismiss the case was just passed. (i.e. everyone woke up)
There is absurdity abound here, clearly.
The WAKA, LLC. A limited liability company (for kickball!). Sounds official, I know. You probably pay your rent to an LLC. Apparently, there is clout to be had in the kickball market, but the “Microsoft of Kickball?” The conglomerate empire…of kickball! Where am I? Even the Initech of kickball shouldn’t exist!
Forget the legal precedent set here, Let’s see if we can get a few of the same cuckoo puff law-types back involved, and reopen these proceedings with Frank Zappa suing for copyright infringement – citing the tampering of his song Waka Zawaka.
For the record, copyright infringement, tampering – I don’t know if any of this is proper terminology. If this wasn’t such fantasy camp stuff, I’d be more concerned.
