I was hoping that Jared Allen would have some deep thoughts on today’s trade that brought Randy Moss back to the Vikings. Nothing too poignant to report from his Twitter feed, yet.

I did manage to come across a sort of rules to live by that Allen posted on his blog Jared’s Journal aptly titled Marriage & Mullets. Here’s the good stuff, and by that I mean his mullet mantra…

Now let’s get down to the hair. I know there are a lot of disappointed fans that I cut my hair. But remember this was never about a hair cut. I said from the beginning that it was a lifestyle. Believe me when I tell you I still rock every bit of that life style. And I still love all you badasses out there still rocking the Mullet. I think this is a good time to restate a few of the lifestyle characteristics.

1. Always highlight your mullet.
2. Always show respect to another Mullet
3. Sleeves optional
4. LOVE AMERICA

I’m still rocking 3 of the 4 and as far as I’m concerned any one rocking 3 of the 4 will always have a place in the Mullet Mullitia.

As I referred to him right after he unveiled the new hairdo at this year’s American Century Championship in Lake Tahoe: newly kempt, but no less ridiculous. He’s also the man responsible for the greatest episode of Cribs not featuring the Ying Yang Twins.

More from Allen and/or his teammates’ Twitter reactions to Randy Moss later on.

The annual American Century Tahoe Celebrity Golf tournament took place over the weekend in Lake Tahoe. It’s always a character driven event. Posted some quick photos of the newly kempt, but no less ridiculous Jared Allen, the ever increasingly sinister Michael Jordan, and others below.

Golf Digest’s senior travel editor Matt Ginella (I want your job) posted a good write-up on the event – check out Lance Armstrong’s mom, stuck in a bunker.

In lieu of being able to be Ginella, I’ll be trying my hand at the game American Century has posted on WGT.com that allows you to play the back nine at Edgewood Tahoe. One lucky winner is going to win a trip to the 2011 tournament. I’m still trying to get my swing down, good thing this game is nicely addictive.

Is ludicrousity (sp.) a word? At least in the sense that when I say that this here is the Brett Favre ludicrousity story that will trump all other Favre ludicrousity stories, you know what I’m talking about?

I’d like to point out that the already oft-blogged story about the car, the innocent auto mechanic James Prusci, the mad woman of Winona, and the curiously purple goat…nay, sacrificial goat sounds even more ridiculous when you Tarantino it and tell the end first.

From the Winona Daily News…

But as the woman walked toward her car, an animal control vehicle and two police cars pulled up, Prusci said.


He’s not sure what happened next.


Winona Police Sgt. Chris Nelson confirmed Prusci’s story Saturday morning, saying the goat was in the care of a local veterinarian.


Animal control officer Wendy Peterson, who investigated the incident, could not be reached for comment. It is unclear if the woman or man were cited.


As for Prusci, he’s just thankful to hear the goat is OK.


“It was definitely the most out-of-the norm thing I’ve ever seen.”

What fully occurred was that on Friday a woman arrived at a Tires Plus in Winona, WI to have a belt replaced on her Chevy Malibu. Shortly thereafter, a goat painted purple and donning Favre’s #4 was discovered in the trunk – because like any brand of cuckoo puff she told Prusci, straightaway, that she had it in there, and intended to slaughter it.

The goat had been painted purple and gold – the colors for the Minnesota Vikings. Shaved into its side was the No. 4 – the number of Brett Favre, who made his Vikings debut Friday night in a preseason game in the Twin Cities.


The goat was lying on its side, tied at its feet. Prusci said it had some pretty big horns.


The workers closed the trunk – they couldn’t have a goat wandering around the shop. But when they checked on the animal later, it wasn’t moving as much.


They called animal control.

Jesus. Tap Dancing. Christ, lady.

H/T to The Sporting Blog for the awesome pic, and @johnthedomingos for the article (which, truth be told, I thought was in the Wino Daily News until about five minutes ago).

Is Favre Goat Story the G.O.A.T.? (The Sporting Blog)

I hate when it comes down to whether or not the keeper guesses which way to lunge on a free kick… of course, when you have 9 hours to decide, that problem doesn’t really apply.

The slow motion replay adds some nice insult to injury.

Also, #20 from the Norwegian Tippeligaen side’s work on this play is utterly soothing to watch – jog towards the net, slow up to let the ball go by into the net, arms raised in whimsical glory!

Video: An incredibly soft 45-yard goal from the Norwegian Premier League (The Spoiler)

Every thrifty media whore out there would probably agree – why buy these days, when you can market?

I was hoping that the Tour of Battenkill meant guided tours of like a British Isle village ransacked by Vikings in the 8th century, preserved in its decrepit state (we could pitch the same people who sponsored the Slayer tour to sign on). Unfortunately, of course it’s for a cycling event instead.

According to the listing, last year’s Tour of Battenkill attracted 1200 racers to the event in Upstate New York, which means if you pony up, you get to be the title sponsor of the largest Pro-Am Cycling Race in America! The fifth annual is being held in April ’09, when they expect 1500 racers and 20,000+ spectators.

I’d borrow funds from the projected Q3 earnings for SB Media Ventures LLC to cover the $150K, but unfortunately I don’t think a cycling event properly aligns with our rock n’ roll image.

(If You Had Money Archive)